Saturday, December 4, 2010

Saturday Centus - Weeks 30 and 31

Somedays it feels like a Speedway here. When I wake up I am surprised there isn't a guy with a checked flag saying, "Hey, slow old woman...start your engines!"

Today is one of those days. My engine is sputtering along and I'm ramping up for a long to do list and a short energy reserve.

So, I'm gonna be lazy now and link two weeks of SC's here in this single post. Prompts are in bold in each. To visit other Week 30 stories, click here. To visit other Week 31 stories, click here.

Week 30

My glare finally made the frail, elderly woman release the last can of pumpkin pie spice. I gave a smile of triump as she turned away in defeat. That was as it should be. I saw it first.

I snarled at the cashier when she suggested I let the pathetic old man behind me go first. Who cares that he had a small bottle of aspirin in his gnarled up arthritic hands and I had an overladen cart. I was there first.

I was so proud of myself. Living my life by horoscope made things so easy. Today’s had been: You have to recognize that a boundary is a boundary.

Week 31

Sitting in the lobby of Dr.Matlock’s pre-nuptial counselling office, I glanced at my fiance in alarm as a couple slammed open the office door. The man’s face was red and hostile, the woman was in tears.

My future mother-in-law had insisted that we attend these sessions. Anxious to please her, I had agreed.

When the sweet faced receptionist called our names, we entered the Doctors office feeling a bit unsure.

After introducing herself, Dr.Matlock simply smiled and showed us the bin of tangled up Christmas lights.

“The first exercise in this session is for you both to untangle these lights. You have five minutes. Ready. Set. Go!”

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Ames said...

Both of your post are seamless Jenny! Very creative!! I especially like the excercise of untangling the lights in the councelors office! That was an evil mother-in-law. Since yesterday was my 25th wedding anniversary, your post made me ponder on whether or not we would have made it this far if we had also gone to see one of those prenup councelors! LOL.

Anonymous said...

Both are great and creative, but I must say--untangling the lights as preparation for marriage is just perfection! Nicely done!


Anonymous said...

Both are great and creative, but I must say--untangling the lights as preparation for marriage is just perfection! Nicely done!


Cheryl said...

NICE! Gettin' your mean on here Jenny.

Susan Anderson said...

Both of these are beyond excellent! Creativity, thought, and execution leave me in awe.


Well done, Jenny!!


Pat Tillett said...

Very creative and funny, Jenny!
Life by horoscope..

Kat said...

Both of these are incredible Jenny! But I cannot for the life of me see you EVER living life by that particular horoscope! And the second one had me rolling. Untangling Christmas lights would be the perfect pre-marriage test. Followed by removing old wallpaper. With a grand finale of fishing speaker wire from the attic through the walls. Funny, we both had wicked MIL's on the brain this week - I swear, mine was fiction. I've NEVER read a Martha Stewart magazine in my life LOL Kat

People Who Know Me Would Say: said...

The first was funny, but the second was GENIUS!!!!

Tina said...

You're so funny. Regardless. I just love my visits here. And the idea of untangling lights before marriage is simply brilliant! said...

I enjoyed these very much, Jenny.
That's one smart counselor.

Maude Lynn said...

Oh, that second one is perfect!

gautami tripathy said...

That Dr is too good!


Viki said...

First of all, I'm glad I wasn't that little old man or old lady at the store, yikes LOL.

Secondly, I guess if the couple can untangle those lights without killing each other, they probably won't need the pre-nuptial counseling. Dr. Matlock will certainly tell them they are good to go.

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

I have to say I adore Week 30!

Susannah said...

Love them both, well done. :-)

Judie said...

What a relief! I was beginning to think I was the only one doing the boundary thing! Thanks, Jenny! You really know how to set boundaries!!

cj Schlottman said...

Dr. Matlock,

Please send me your office number. I know a couple who need a dose or your medicine!

Love the horoscope, too! Always love reading you. Namaste.........cj

Anonymous said...

That is one smart doctor.
Btw, did the couple survive the ordeal?

Tgoette said...

Oh Jenny, you had me at "I snarled at the cashier." I loved both these stories. So unbelievably creative and well-written. How do you maintain such consistency from one post to the next? Amazing!

I think my wife and I would have aced Dr. Matlock's test by the way. We work so well as a team. I do the work while she stands over me and tells me I'm doing it wrong. Ahh, bliss!