Saturday, June 11, 2011

And the Walls Come Tumbling Down...

The wall was built long ago. Today I will begin tearing it down.

I am afraid that I will not have enough courage, but I cannot hide anymore behind the excuse that my life has been too difficult and it is impossible to find happiness.

I will no longer allow the tragedies that have consumed my emotions for almost two decades to define my emotions.

I will no longer permit my past to pave a sad, grey pathway to my future.

Today I will begin, quietly at first, by chipping a bit of mortar away with the sheer force of my will. Or maybe I will simply shove hard against the rough bricks encasing the broken shards of my long lost hope.

When I see that the wall’s insurmountable presence has been made strong only with the power of my mind, I will work harder. I will scrape against the coarse concrete with the fingernails of my determination, until I see a bit of light streaming through the obstacle I have built in the hopes of protecting a heart broken by torment and misery.

Yes, this wall was built long ago, but today is the day I will begin tearing it down.

Please pray for me.

This little work of fiction is linked to week 58 of Saturday Centus.

The prompt is in bold.

To visit other links, just click here.

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21 comments:

  1. Dazee DreamerJune 11, 2011 at 2:53 PM

    wow. I got goosebumps reading this. Me thinks there is some hidden truth in this.

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  2. "Alone again.... naturally!"June 11, 2011 at 3:09 PM

    I was actually thinking the same thing...hope all is well with you Jenny!

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  3. JoJune 11, 2011 at 3:27 PM

    whoa Jenny ... that was quite a ride ... i love "with the fingernails of my determination" ... great imagery in this piece! bravo!

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  4. AmesJune 11, 2011 at 3:30 PM

    Wow! Empowerment. Encouragement. Know that you are in someone's prayers somewhere, and always in mine.
    Go get a mani.
    Hugs!~Ames

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  5. NonnaJune 11, 2011 at 3:46 PM

    Outstanding Jenny !

    The comparative imagery, the hopeful theme of fighting on and looking for a solution and this: "shove hard against the rough bricks encasing the broken shards of my long lost hope."

    Wow, this story really spoke deeply to me !!!

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  6. Laura@OutnumberedMomJune 11, 2011 at 4:07 PM

    Thanks for hosting, Jenny. This was really fun! I think you and I were behind similar walls in this exercise, weren't we? Lovely.

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  7. BookieJune 11, 2011 at 4:12 PM

    Stunning!

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  8. LaJune 11, 2011 at 4:35 PM

    Very powerful, Jenny.

    I hope you are having a fantastic weekend.

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  9. cj SchlottmanJune 11, 2011 at 5:03 PM

    Wow. Just wow.

    Jenny, this beautiful and raw and brutal piece took my breath away. I reread it twice, just for the visceral effect it had on me.

    I'm going to print it up and tape it to my bathroom mirror. It was as though you were talking to me.

    Let the healing begin.

    Namaste..........cj

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  10. UnknownJune 11, 2011 at 5:24 PM

    I feel like I'm right there with you on this one!

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  11. WilloughbyJune 11, 2011 at 6:25 PM

    Amazing and powerful.

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  12. Rawknrobyn.blogspot.comJune 11, 2011 at 7:47 PM

    This gave me chills. Like Jo, I really like "fingernails of my determination". This is truly empowering. I want to just cheer you/the narrator on!
    xoRobyn

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  13. gayleJune 11, 2011 at 8:11 PM

    I loved this!

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  14. KatJune 11, 2011 at 8:37 PM

    Wow, Jenny. Just wow! This was such a powerful piece. It really spoke to me. I've missed you sweetie! Kat

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  15. Susan AndersonJune 11, 2011 at 8:37 PM

    Wonderful job, Jenny. I loved the "fingernails of my determination."

    A tour de force, for sure.

    =)

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  16. Moore MinutesJune 11, 2011 at 9:04 PM

    Everything you write is simply MOVING. I love that about YOU and your writing, Jenny. I could relate to parts of your fictional work today and wanted to thank you. <3

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  17. Ms. AJune 11, 2011 at 11:51 PM

    I just build my walls higher and stronger.

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  18. AmandaJune 12, 2011 at 12:36 AM

    Very visual and very moving.

    This may be fiction but I can relate bit too well to it.

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  19. JudieJune 12, 2011 at 12:47 PM

    Jenny, if I can do it, you can, too! Wonderful writing!!!

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  20. SharonJune 12, 2011 at 6:15 PM

    This is me! I felt like you were looking inside me ~ Pondering my meanderings!

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  21. Rek SeshJune 14, 2011 at 1:01 PM

    This is beautifully narrated..I can sense her determination and her need to put the ghosts of the past to rest with each new line.

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Hi! Thanks for leaving a comment! My handy dandy e-mail assistant always notifies me when you do and I read every single one.

I try to respond to comments with a return e-mail BUT I just noticed that I've been answering a lot of them to blogs that haven't linked their e-mail address to their Google account! I haven't been ignoring your comments, but now I know you aren't getting my reply e-mails! I'm sorry!

I know a lot of other bloggers who respond to comments via e-mail so if you haven't left off your e-mail on purpose, you might want to add it on! If you don't know how you can let me know in your comment and I'll see if I can help you!

Thanks so much for reading my 'Tangents'! Your comments always feel like a hug!

Jenny Matlock