Monday, August 29, 2011

Surprise! I'm Pregnant!

This little story is linked to week 69 of Saturday Centus. The three word prompt is in bold and we have 150 words to tell the tale. To read other links using the same prompt, just click here.

AHEM!!!!!



It was tough being the only fat one in a family filled with skinny-minnies.

I had planned to be much slimmer for the annual family reunion. Sadly, my intentions were bigger then the actual results, so it was just a matter of moments before my scrawny cousins were huddled together whispering. Snatches of their conversation drifted over to me… “Omar the Tentmaker…they raised the Titanic?…”

Damn them. I couldn’t help it if I had a slow metabolism. And if they kept watching me how was I ever going to be able to get some slices of Aunt Gertrude’s famous pies?

Suddenly I was seized with a brilliant idea!

I clapped my hands together. “I have an announcement everyone! “Surprise! I’m pregnant!”

My Aunt’s gathered around me. “Oh, what blessed news, dear. Here. Let me get you a piece of pie!”

I squinted my eyes meanly at my cousins. “Take that you skinny …”


Sorry readers. I ran out of words. You will have to imagine the final one. mwahahahahahahahahahahaha!

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17 comments:

  1. UnknownAugust 29, 2011 at 7:01 AM

    LOL, good one!

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  2. Bethe77August 29, 2011 at 7:04 AM

    Jenny! I love how she got around her mean skinny cousins and some wonderful pie from her aunt.
    Clever indeed!
    Blessings

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  3. Kim LehnhoffAugust 29, 2011 at 7:36 AM

    I fear she's gonna have some 'splainin' to do!

    Great job! I found this prompt to be a hard one...took me quite a while to come up with something - and ending up just telling the truth.

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  4. AbhishekAugust 29, 2011 at 7:37 AM

    Wow!! This was awesome!!


    I really thought you were pregnant!! My goodness this is awesome!! LOL!!!

    with warm regards
    Another Author

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  5. Susan AndersonAugust 29, 2011 at 8:07 AM

    heehee

    The sad thing is when you get to the age (as I have) that the pregnancy ruse just ain't gonna work...

    ;)

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  6. Barbara F.August 29, 2011 at 8:32 AM

    I am at that age, so can't use that one either!! xo

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  7. CassyAugust 29, 2011 at 8:54 AM

    Congrats Jenny!


    Cassy from Best Guitar Lessons

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  8. NatureGirlAugust 29, 2011 at 9:46 AM

    BRAVO dear friend BRAVO! Hilarious...

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  9. Dazee DreamerAugust 29, 2011 at 11:34 AM

    uh huh. you ran out of words......right. You just wanted to keep it PG. :)

    I loved it.

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  10. Ms. AAugust 29, 2011 at 1:04 PM

    I used to hate when people would ask my due date and I wasn't pregnant! Now, with grayer hair, wrinkles and age spots, they know for a fact, I'm just fat!

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  11. To the Toy Box and BeyondAugust 29, 2011 at 1:08 PM

    haha great post... This afternoon I told one of the waitress at a restaurant we frequent "Do you wanna hear my news?" She thought I was going to say I was pregnant but instead I told her I was going to be a grandma. She was a little shocked to say the least.

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  12. JoAugust 29, 2011 at 6:39 PM

    do we have to imagine g rated words? great take on the prompt Jenny, gave me a chuckle!!!

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  13. JudieAugust 29, 2011 at 8:56 PM

    Clever way to get that pie, but at my age, I don't think it would work.

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  14. TgoetteAugust 29, 2011 at 10:24 PM

    LOL! Very funny, Jenny! I think the final word you are missing is bit...oops, I mean witches! Great job!

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  15. AmesAugust 29, 2011 at 10:26 PM

    I bet I know what the last word is....starts with a "B" and ends with an "S"? Skinny "B"....."S"! Some of these skinny "B"....."S" end up with bigger backsides than us fluffly girls! I think God has a sense of humor too.

    I say go for the pie and do an hour on the treadmill.~Ames

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  16. bjAugust 30, 2011 at 4:30 PM

    PRICELESS....

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  17. AmyAugust 30, 2011 at 9:16 PM

    I just love this! It made me laugh. Absolutely brilliant, that's what.

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Jenny Matlock