Friday, January 29, 2010

ACCCCKKKK!!!!! Why didn't you tell me it was Friday????


Just kiddin'

I think I'm pretty much under control.

Kind of.

Two small crisis yesterday - one of which is not yet resolved ...

The first crisis of the day started when the girl that was coming to do all of our hair called in tears. She has a troubled husband who decided to become more troubled ... being vague but it was a horrible mess. I told her "no worries, it's just hair".

I didn't panic until I realized "wait, this is Thursday, who am I gonna get to do hair on a Friday afternoon with no warning?"

While I was realizing that I might have a problem with that, the photographer Chick called to tell me that she and her whole family were down with the stomach flu. She sounded on deaths door.

So...

I took a deep breath, wrote a panicked e-mail to PJ (thanks PJ!) and calmed down.

Found someone else to do candid shots all night with my husbands camera but struck out in the hair department after one of my daughters, my Mom and I called every salon and beauty school in the area.

I called everyone last night to tell them about the problem...Trying to come up with some alternatives...but nothin' yet. I'm wondering if Great Clips or one of those places could do it if I took a picture along?

Hmmm.... or an old style beauty salon in one of the retirement areas? Surely those shops do 50 year old hair styles all day long.

Hmmm...

OK, thanks for listening to that...it gave me a new idea.

Other than that I think I have finally organized my list of lists! and I even tried on my clothes yesterday.

My spanx finally arrived. Certain that I would look exactly like the models in these pictures with this miraculous product I decided not to attempt to loose weight in the past six days.

And .... Ummm... I need to write to some consumer place somewhere because it's not exactly how the whole thing is working out.

And I'm gonna be honest here...I'm thinking breathing comfortably might be over-rated.

After I had finally gyrated into it and put my dress on I did look a little slimmer. I made my husband hug me in my outfit and asked him if I felt skinnier.

Sometimes I feel sorry for him.

He said "well, you feel firmer" and I asked him like "firmer fat or just firmer?"

AND HE REFUSED TO ANSWER ME!

But I think he was still annoyed for me waking him up at 2 am so I could tell him "OH NO! I FORGOT TO GET BIRTHDAY CANDLES!"

I think he mumbled something about "just kill me now" but I was running to my office to put that on the list of things I forgot to remember earlier. Or one of the many lists like that.

Sigh.

In the midst of all the hair, photograph, final list issues I now don't know whether I am firmer or just have firmer fat.

At least I don't have to worry about having not enough food for the four people who called yesterday to RSVP because obviously RSVP by January 10 is just a suggestion. I suspect I am not going to be able to eat much because I will be wearing that device of compression and torture.

Hold on a sec.

Thanks. Had to write down "take ziploc baggies" so I can stash some food in my bag to eat when I come home and take off said torture device.

Sigh.

I apologize for all the sighing here this morning but I still can't catch my breath from having all my fat compressed into my abdomen and rib cage yesterday.

So I am off to double and triple check my lists, loose 50 pounds, and find a miracle worker for hair.

You can post to the Alphabe-Thursday McLinky until Saturday morning (I know that's confusing, but, hey, what isn't here on my blog?)

AND I promise I'll share a bunch of pictures.

AND I'm beggin' ya please don't be mad at me today if I don't answer your e-mails.

Because I'm trying to conserve my energy and my oxygen for later...when I'm wearing the spanx.

Sigh.

22 comments:

Cedar ... said...

Looking forward to lots of party pix on your blog! Relax, have fun!

Amy said...

Breathe Jenny! Everything is going to be FAB!

Linda said...

Well try to breathe! LOL, I don't think I want any Spanx now! You will be fine and have a blast!

Kimberly said...

Can't wait to see the pictures of the party! I am sure you'll look beautiful!

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Courage!!!

>,-)

Julie Schuler said...

oooh! I keep hearing about those spanx, thanks for posting a pic, now I know what they are all about.

People not RSVPing on time is one of my peeves.

Have a great time and post some pics!

5thsister said...

I'm still chuckling over firmer vs firmer fat! With that said, it's going to be just fine! Take a deep breath. Oh, that's right. You can't. Bummer. :o(

Seriously,the party is going to be wonderful, just you wait and see. And you're going to look absolutely awesome! Can't wait for the pics!

Mumsy said...

Is this what they called panic attack? Calm down, Jenny, relax and enjoy the party..

All My Yesterdays said...

Just be YOU Jenny, things will all fall in place...
Bummer about the looser husband..hers, NOT yours, he's a trooper! Dang flu crap anyway. And the retirement idea for hair is great. I bet you've already called and found someone. Funny about the Spanx. Let them know about the breathing problem (O:
Some people just don't do the RSVP thing and come anyway. Shame on them! ok, I'm holding my own breath till I check back here tomorrow night...
I know you'll do fine and everyone will be so glad they came. I would if I could..

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Okay... time to breathe, and all will be well. Stopping by on my way out of town. Hope you have a super weekend!

XO,

Sheila :-)

Theresa said...

Sigh:) I bet you are one slim, trim lovely lady in those squeezers! Love listening to your stories. You are the great entertainer. Can't wait to see pics.

Flat Creek Farm said...

Oh my! Be careful in that contraption! Can't wait to hear all about the partay :) -Tammy

Viki said...

You don't have to email. I hope everything works out and it's a wonderful birthday for your dad.

Life is good! said...

firmer is firmer- don't ask questions! and have a grand time!!!!

Wanda said...

Thanx for the spanx review Jenny!

Sue (Someone's Mom) said...

I'm obviously reading these backwards...as by the time I got to this one...the hair problem was solved.

I really like you! You make me laugh!

Sue

laterg8r said...

CRISIS!!! I'm sure the party will be the best EVER!!!

sorry that you won't be breathing through it, but hey, you'll look good LOL :D

gayle said...

New follow so I don't know a whole lot but I do hope you have a wonderful party!!

Bits-n-Pieces said...

I want some spanx. or Body Magic. My friend has that one and it's suppose to slim you down 2 sizes when you wear it or something. 2 sizes wouldn't be a big difference for me...but it might MAKE me feel thinner. If I could breathe. I'll have to think about that.

Chatty Crone said...

You are too funny. I love the spanx story - I thried them ONCE too!

Sandie

Annesphamily said...

Jenny your are the best! Thanks for sending me a nice message.

Rella said...

OMG...I am almost piddling my pants from trying to hold back the laughter because I am reading this at my desk where I am supposed to be working. OMG...OMG...you are just about the funniest gal in bloglandia I swear!!!

thank you for this.

xox Rella