Sunday, April 4, 2010

When I was a young girl ... (PKW)

(Possible kleenex warning!)

When I was a young girl, I believed that when I turned the radio off the music would stop.

And I was always puzzled when I would turn it back on hours, or even days later, that the song had changed.

I was so certain that "I think We're Alone Now" would still be playing, that I would start singing where it had stopped.

And for a long, long time I was always surprised.

It took me a while to figure out that the music went on for other people while it had stopped for me.

And sometimes on holidays, I feel like that still.

That somehow, my holiday will pick up automatically from last year and the year before that and the year before that.

That maybe I could start singing "Here Comes Peter Cottontail" and my childrens voices would join me in discordant harmony because only a day had passed since the last holiday.

In my head I am somehow still expecting my children to be small and dancing about in excitement with their little blond heads gilded with crazy morning hair, their eyes bright, their teeth shining in perfect little rows of dazzling white pearls. And I am always astonished that this is not the case.

I wonder how the years have passed so quickly.

And even though I keep the holiday traditions as best I can, there are never little feet running down the stairs in excitement now...or little voices squabbling over who got the most jellybeans...and certainly never little voices tired and tender with just-tucked-in sleepiness saying...

"Mommy, is there really an Easter Bunny?"

For you young mothers out there remember that these times will end.

That the radio keeps playing even when you are busy with housework and feeling overwhelmed with all the why's and bickering and running around that raising small children consists of.

That radio just keeps on playing and someday you will be in this moment puzzled and wondering why-oh-why-did-that-music-not-just-stop-playing when you weren't looking.

There is a simple quote that I try to embrace each waking moment...simple but somehow true for me.

"May you live every day of your life."

And just by your posts and e-mails we share I know so many of you do just that.

But as a Mother whose children are grown and gone can I just tell you something?

Remember it all. Hold it close. Treasure it now. Live it to the fullest.

Slow the music down while you can.

And remember all the melodies for someday.

They will be the songs that will help soothe your soul when your nest has grown empty.

Wishing you all hugs, moments of new memories, beautiful melodies and happy times remembered.

post signature

48 comments:

Chatty Crone said...

Have a blessed Easter.
sandie

Vicki said...

Pretty deep words Jenny...

I for one know the true feeling of 'Empty Nest' so thank you for reminding other mom's of how precious their children are. Keep them close..always. Because life, like the music, goes on......

Hope you're having a wonderful Easter with those who love you.

Self Sagacity said...

Yes, right now, sometimes I wish I have more time to myself, and that it's not all spent towards taking care of someone. But I do realize how fast time goes by and I am growing older at the same time! So I have to remember to just enjoy life today. Happy Easter!

Gail said...

HI JENNY_

Wow, great writing - I felt every word - understood every feeling - lived every moment - and touse that childhood experience of the radio to wrap this wonderful writing around is pure genius. "Thank you" for sharing the gift of your wonderful writing style.

Happy Easter to you and yours
Love Gail
peace.....

MrsJenB said...

Beautiful as always, Jenny. I can imagine that this is how my parents feel - granted, I still have two younger sibs at home but they're teenagers and it's not the same anymore. And now m parents are coming to MY house for Easter. Pretty weird.

Have a wonderful and blessed day!

Sheila said...

OH how right on you are.. They just dont last and we take it all for grantid.. hold on to yesterday.. Take lots of photos.. Happy Easter. God Bless.. Sheila

Carol said...

Even with my kids home...they have long out grown the simple joys of most holidays. I remember taking them to the zoo every Easter, now I'm lucky if they are home on Easter Sunday. Today I am lucky and will live in the moment....they are going to spend the day with me. They won't dye eggs, or search for hidden ones but they are present....and that's all that matters! Enjoy your kids....regardless of their age!

Kass said...

That empty nest thing is hard to imagine when all the children are underfoot. I have frequent dreams of my small children where they are stuck at the ages they were when I divorced their father. At least I have that.

jeff campbell said...

Wow Jenny! You are deep...not like the well, but as in the heart, soul, and mind. It is a good thing that the radio keeps playing, that the music carries on, changes. For it is by this that each day, each moment of each day brings us the opportunity to gain new insights, new wisdom, somehow enriching our life and the lives of those around us. All that being said and understood I know from where you are coming:-) Namaste my friend...

Ms. Anthropy said...

My house is quiet as a tomb, not even a radio playing. Everyone is doing their own thing, somewhere else. Never dreamed, all those years ago, it would ever be THIS quiet and THIS empty, or that I wouldn't enjoy it.

Some little birdies arrived yesterday. Thanks Jenny, Happy Easter!

Nicole Carpenter said...

Hi Jenny:) Thank you so much for visiting my blog a few days ago!

This post you wrote about the power of 'time' reins so true, and quite possibly is one of the hardest things a person has to accept. I really think that being a mother gives us the ability to visually witness how swiftly time flows, and just like your radio analogy (which made me smile) we are unable to pause 'our favorite parts' for later. The music continues to play, and we MUST continue to dance:)

I hope you have a fabulous EASTER!! And I am excited to read more of your posts... xoxo

Linda said...

Dear Jenny, this is soooo true! I can't believe my 'babies' are so grown up now. I miss those days and nights! Memories are a wonderful thing and I also tell young Mother's to enjoy it, they grow up so fast.
Happy Easter Dear Friend!

Julie Harward said...

I feel the same way my friend...I look at their pictures of past Easters and their little dresses and bows...oh how I miss it...they are in their 30's and I am still calling them the kids! Have a good Easter day...come say hi :D

LemonyRenee' said...

That's beautiful, Jenny. Thank you. I'm logging off now to go blow bubbles with my kids . . . somehow the Easter Bunny knows when they need more bubbles. ;)

Pondside said...

True, true, true Jenny.
I said much the same thing, although much less eloquently, to my daughter-in-law yesterday when she phoned. Sometimes young mums just need 'permission' to let stuff go and just get down on the floor with the kids.

Sh@KiR@ CK said...

I would like to wish you and your family
Many Easter Blessings and have you a great Easter!
hugs
shakira

Sares said...

Happy Easter Jenny! I hope you have a wonderful day with some little ones sprinkled in somewhere! So you can still hear the pitter pattter of little feet, the newest generation!

Jennifer said...

Nice post, Jenny. Made me smile, and feel for ya'. :)

I think my dad might be feeling these same pangs right now... I couldn't even come home for Easter... At least my brother is still there, though. (Of course, there is a possibility my dad would rather it be me that was still home, haha. [Or is that just how I picture it?])

Have a Happy Easter! :D I hope it is a good one!

Amanda said...

SIGH...

Coralie Cederna Johnson said...

One Easter when I wanted more than anything to grow up, my mother ordered from the Alden's catalog the red shoulder strap purse I had been mooning over for ages. I could not wait for Easter to arrive but it finally did along with that beautiful red purse. The purse had a small coin purse on a chain that fit perfectly into a pocket on the front of the larger purse. I took it out and put it back in dozens of times. I slung that beautiful bag over my shoulder and walked with my head held high...all day. Every single Easter, I think of that red purse and how it fit so perfectly into my dreams. Yet, I cannot say whatever happened to it. All I know is that it is forever caught within my memory...a sweet sweet memory of growing up!

Happy Easter, Sweet Jenny!
Coralie

Country Wings in Phoenix said...

Happy Easter Jenny...
Sweetie I pray that you have a beautiful day today, share some memories with family and enjoy your day. Yes it was quiet this morning, and the kids were not here to fight over jelly beans but the grands sure made up for it when they got here. Aren't grandkids just wonderful?

I hope your health is better sweetie. I have been praying for you.

Have a beautiful afternoon. Country hugs sweetie and much love, Sherry

Theresa said...

All so true dear Jenny! I am better at doing all that with the Grandkids than I was with my Daughter. I HAD to work when she was little and didn't get to attend all of the things at school like I do now. I thing that is one reason that I don't MISS a thing now, enjoy every little 'ole tiny thing they all do. My five year old Granddaughter has learned to dial my phone number and calls every day wanting to come over. My husband said before long, she'll be 14 like Autumn and have other things to do:( That is also true! Have a blessed evening my friend! Hugs from me!

Dee said...

So very true Jenny...The years pass quickly...In the past few years my husband and I have slipped from everyone being at our house on the holidays, to sitting by the phone waitng for phone calls. Last year we began getting together with some of our friends in the same situation to start a new era in our life, make new memories. It has worked well and takes guilt and pressure off the kids. But I do miss the good old days. This has been a good blog...deep! :)

Terri and Bob said...

Amen, sister!

Loved the card and the oh so cute necklace. You spoil me.

sissie said...

Hi Jenny,
Your writing today spoke to me and reminded me of when my son was small. There were times when I was too busy to give him the attention that I should have. I wish I could have those days to do it all over again.

What a sweet, heart touching post.

hugs
Sissie

Flat Creek Farm said...

What a great, but bittersweet comparison. Yes, sadly, the radio keeps playing. Today we celebrated Easter and our son's 28th birthday - which was actually last Wednesday. So many times through the years we've had that same dual celebration, but with an Easter egg hunt. Today as we walked in the green grass in the lawn visiting with family, I wished for those days... and the colorful Easter eggs to be hiding in that green grass.

Lovely thoughts and great advice for those young moms, Jenny! Hope you and yours have enjoyed a wonderful Easter. -Tammy

kim said...

Jenny, it is so so true. No kids around takes getting used to when the holidays roll around. I hope the young families take time to truly enjoy being together. I hope they eat dinners together and not scattered here and there and running here and there. The kids do grown up so fast and then they are gone! Of course then there is the grand kids. Mine are four hours away though. I will have one close by come October though. My daughter is expecting!!

Brenda said...

Your word is coming to mind again. Sigh. All the family has gone home for the day. Hubs went to his den to decompress and I am sitting here thinking the house is to quiet. This one gave me a catch in my chest. Great post Jenny. Hugs back to you.

Draffin Bears said...

Hi Jenny,

Life does bring lots of changes and many happy memories. Beautiful post.
I hope that you are having a lovely Easter.

Hugs
Carolyn

Sandy said...

Jenny,
I am fairly new to your blog, but I can't believe how your posts touch me! Today was just another Sunday for me. My husband had to work, Wal-Mart only closed one day a year....my sons are now grown men, 30 and 26.....last week I helped tham as best as I could, move into their first home. I have a little article that my Mom gave me when ,my 30 year old was born....and the last lines say something like this....
it speaks of how many things we get angry about while raising our kids and the last two line are "Why don't you just grow up? And in the silence I hear " I did".....
OK...going to get the Kleenex....

Mumsy said...

Two of my children have gone out on their own, and I some times wonder what happened to the years they were little..Beautiful writing, Jenny.

Hope your Easter was a blessed one.

mrs. c said...

My heart goes out to you because I still get the wonder of each holiday through my children in my pre-k class and of course the famous "miss v".

I am a child at heart and I know that some people might think it silly to have Easter baskets for 30, 29, 19 and 9 year olds, but I am kinda like Scarlett O'Hara holding up my hand to the sky sayingI WILL MAKE AN EASTER BASKET FOR EACH OF MY CHILDREN EVERY YEAR AND WE WILL HUNT EASTER EGGS!

One of my parents put it so well...she said simply that I am making memories. Jenny you know that better than most because everything you do is a memory for someone! Happy Easter my dear friend!

Kelly's Lucky You said...

Thank you so much for stopping by my blog. I'm so happy to have found yours! I have goose bumps after reading this post.... I have a four year old and I already am amazed at how fast the time has gone. So much has changed already.

Thank you for sharing your feelings and reminding me to treasure every moment - even the frustrating ones ;)

Kelly

Jennifer said...

I just recently got my first ever blog award. I don't typically do this sort of thing, but I thought it was appropriate to give one to some of my favorite bloggers, and you're one of them! Check out my Easter blog post to see the new award. :)

gayle said...

You have said what my heart couldn't put into words!!! I wish I could make my daughter and all the young mothers that I know to realize how fast it goes by!!
Hope you had a wonderful day!!

KK said...

Happy Easter

Tina said...

Simply beautiful. Reminds me of a quote an "older" mother gave to me when my kids were little. She said, "The days will be very long, but the years are so very short." My abrupt u-turn/halt has opened my eyes yet again to how quickly my precious boys are growing up. I'm focusing on deliberately savoring this time with them, since it's obvious that it's God's plan for me right now. Your lovely radio analogy touched me as another reminder of how short a time we have with our kids before they're out of the nest. Thank you my friend.

Gweny said...

Jenny, you posted by far the most heart felt blog of all today. Beautifully written and thought provoking. I too miss the sounds of my little ones but the Grandkids, with all their pranks, squabbles, and rambunctiousness, were a joy today. After they were gone, I set and enjoyed the silence for a short time and then wished for more of it. I'm so fortunate to have all mine live so close and still come home and look forward to the traditions I began so many years ago. My three children turned into eight and oh what fun they can be. I'm only reminded that they too are growing and will soon be leaving their nest to fly on their own. (my oldest grandson graduates this year and will be off to college in the fall) God Bless you Jenny!

My name is PJ. said...

You haven't just plucked the heart strings of Memory Lane, you've twanged them!

Pause for thought, Matlock. There is nothing better in a blog post than that!

Julie Schuler said...

We thoroughly enjoy our children, and I am grateful to be at home with them full time. Sometimes we feel guilty if we haven't appreciated them enough, but sometimes they do work exceedingly hard on your last nerve!

Nadeen said...

There was a chair strategically set in our living room where I could see down the hall. As my boys would pick up after a day's play and pitter patter up and down that hayllway, I used that well appointed chair to sit and watch those little buns tottered and just soak it in.

BECKY said...

Jenny, I feel exactly the same way. For the past 2 or 3 years, I've felt it even more. When I see toddlers, 5 year olds, 10 year olds, etc with their moms in stores, I think back to when both my sons were little. And lately, I feel so sad that those years are gone. I know that at least I DID enjoy them, I loved them, I cherished our time together, I really didn't lose my patience much at all with them. They knew, and still know as grown men, that they are loved. Life is just so minute....we really must LIVE each day. Thanks for sharing!

Personalized Sketches and Sentiments said...

...once again...perfection!

Traditions started from one generation to the next are like the wonderful old photos that we are so blessed to have! They both bring back so many cherished memories!

This is one of the few Easters that my hubby and I did not spend with our three grown kids...Their college spring breaks just didnt fall with Easter this year. One of our traditions for Easter started when our 19 yr old was an infant. It was a Scavenger hunt with a clue to another clue and on and on ti they each found their own little surprises. Throughout the years, they would help make the clues for the other... Well, today, they received in the mail a "Scavenger Hunt in a box"...I wrapped their little gifts over and over, multiple times and between each was a note...

Can't wait til we are grandparents and continue this little tradition.

Blessings & Aloha!

Unprocessed1 said...

Nope, didn't cry. But, I totally feel the same way and think of that often. Wish I had enjoyed it more, worried less, when I was a young mom!

MissKris said...

It wasn't until I began doing daily day care for my grandsons that I learned just how much I missed out on my children's childhood. Even tho I was there, and an active participant. But I had no idea how fast those years would pass when I was in the midst of them. One thing I will be eternally thankful for is the fact my grandkids truly taught me the value of taking the time to stop and smell the roses. Oh, Jenny...this was beautiful!

Anita said...

Oh Jenny, I know this is true. My children are 16(twin girls) and 12 and the years are flying by. I also have parents in their 80's and I see how I am still their child, their baby and they mean so much to me still.
I try very hard to remember it all, to cherish each moment............it's not easy.
Wonderful post. The music does still play.

Everyday Kathy said...

Lovely post. My girl is three. I'm doing my best to not miss a thing knowing that I will anyway. It sure does fly by! Thanks for a wise perspective!

Kathy over at Everyday Bliss

BONNIE K said...

The beginning of this post reminded me that when I was little, when I turned off the black and white TV, I envisioned everyone's TV going off. And people would be pleading with me to not turn off the TV! Thought I was alone in that! Anyway, I enjoyed this post very much.