Thursday, October 21, 2010

E is for...an almost failed romance

...

Hey, don't look at me like that.

I know 'almost failed romance' doesn't start with the letter "E". But this really is my E post for Alphabe-Thursday and I will tell you why. Please take a deep breath at this point because you may feel briefly light-headed following this out-of-control train of thought.

...

So...

You know that the word ELEPHANT starts with the letter "E", right?

BUT...

Did you know, I almost had a failed romance because my husband had a giant ummm... ummm... elephant that he brought to the relationship.

Yea.

I was torn.

I was afraid of the darned thing, it was sooooo huge I totally wondered how I would ever manage it or where I could possibly put it.

But size is never supposed to matter in true love, so romance finally triumphed.

AND...

We got married...

And...

...with great dismay I hung the elephant over the unused fireplace in the living room.



This atrocious thing is over 4' tall. And when it falls on you it hurts. And, NosirreeBob, there has never, ever been a point in my life when I fantasized about a giant .... ummm.... elephant...

AND...

Huh?

WHAT?

What did you think I was talking about?!?

Of course, I was writing about a giant elephant right from the very beginning of this post.

Geez.

To see other non-size related posts from Alphabe-Thursday, just click here.

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42 comments:

gabe said...

WOW. . .you weren't kidding when you said BIG elephant!!

You must really love that man!

Bonnie said...

As always you make me giggle....

Of course size doesn't matter when it's true love...and we are talking about elephants!

I have always loved elephants and have collected a few small ones but I do have to admit I have a little bit of elephant envy here.

Christy said...

I don't know Jenny that might of been a deal breaker for me!! That is a man cave decoration if I have ever seen one - I agree with Gabe - you must really love your husband!!

EG Wow said...

Four feet! YIKES!

lissa said...

that thing looks odd and heavy - so this must means love if you are willing to hang this in your house...

Teresa said...

Look on the bright side - at least it was only the head! I'd hate to have to find a spot for the WHOLE elephant when the head is 4 feet.

Jo said...

O...M...G... okay that would be a relationship killer for me ... and i love elephants ... on the other hand ...

La said...

Stop reading my "dirty" mind, Jenny! :o)

Nora Johnson said...

We had an elephant-sized laugh reading this hilarious post!

XOXO Lola & Nora:)

PS Unsure now if they do laugh...!

Life in Rehab said...

Oh, Jenny, you are just the right kind of wrong...

The Quintessential Magpie said...

LOL!

XO,

Sheila :-)

P.S. I heard Joan Baez sing this in concert along with Bob Dylan. Touch me! LOL! She was a much better former. Shhhhh.... don't tell Bob and the Rolling Thunder Review. ;-)

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Uh, better performer... NOT former! Typo Queen rides again!

Sue said...

I love that you hung that elephant over your fireplace!

(I hope you're not kidding, because I like it.)

That enormous, shining symbol of romance thing is perfect! And meaningful, which is even better. (I like meaning in a home...)

=)

Willoughby said...

I don't think I've ever seen an elephant quite like that before! I think it's pretty awesome!

I honestly thought you meant some sort of deep, dark secret. You know, like the proverbial "elephant in the room". I envisioned something along the lines of "He had a tattoo of a dancing girl and the name Lulu on his forearm. Who was this Lulu? I could see her when he wore short sleeved shirts but he never talked about her. I wanted to ask because she was, after all, the elephant in the room."

Have I overthought this? Perhaps...

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

I can always count on a smile when I come here!

Giant elephant...hmmmm....

BEAR's Mom said...

this is too funny...
does he like eggs???
~victoria~

J. Kwiatkowski said...

That is a truly terrible decoration, and I like elephants.

Amanda said...

Oh dear. That really is true love.

JDaniel4's Mom said...

I think the elephant would have ended up in my husband's man cave.

Cheryl D. said...

Kudos! That was one truly funny post! You totally got me.

Cheryl said...

Got me too! My sister would love that thing. I mean that sincerely.

Jackie said...

lol that is a gorgeous elephant ! you almost failed at romance because of that ?! I can understand I guess . It's better than a deer head . Phil likes Tazmanian devils particularly the Taz cartoon . ugh.

Write Chick said...

I always love your posts. You have such a great sense of humor. I have to admit...that is one GIGANTIC elephant head. You are so nice to hang it up in such a place of honor.
Hahaha...laughed out loud.

Splendid Little Stars said...

YIKES! That...umm...elephant...IS huge!
I like elephants, too, and have a small collection of about 6. None are over 3" tall. Size does not matter at all!

mub said...

I'm impressed that you haven't made the elephant have a tragic accident ;)

Ames said...

Oh...my...goodness! (now Jenny, are you hoping the trunk will catch fire?)I mean...shazam!! That's a big sucker. You're a better woman than me. Garages have walls don't they??? :D ~Ames

Judie said...

Sweetie, that thing! That big honking thing! No, Jenny! You should have drawn the line. I would have done it in a heartbeat! You are stuck now, sister! Please tell me this is an old picture and the thing fell and broke and could not be repaired.

Jeanie said...

Egad! It doesn't even take a dirty mind to Equate that Elephant with something.....else.

Jen said...

Funny...what in the world is the purpose of that huge thing!
Have you grown to like it at all?
I'd guess not.

razzamadazzle said...

Wow! That is one impressive giant elephant! Hopefully it doesn't fall on you very often.

Teresa

CollectIn Texas Gal said...

I have a friend who collects elephants and has hundreds of them on every shelf, nook and cranny in her house. She would gladly have that elephant hanging over her fireplace to match her elephant footstool...and I do mean Elephant Foot stool. Great...BIG...Letter E Post!

Busy Bee Suz said...

That is the biggest elephant I have ever seen...indoors.
You are one tolerant woman Jenny.
xoxoxo

Busy Bee Suz said...

ps. I love elephants.

tsonodablog said...

Elephant.....terrible. Glad you didn't get hurt.

Made an (E)xcellent post, though.

Nice!

Thanks,
Terri

Yanet @ 3 Sun Kissed Boys said...

Four feet AND it's brass. Yikes! I think every man comes with some kind of hidious (sp?) decor thing into a relationship. Glad yours survived it. ;•)

marisworld said...

...and I thought I had trouble with the 80's stereo music centre...which incidentally STILL lives in our front room and only very recently has his lordship actually mentioned buying something smaller and neater.
I wait with abaited breath
Nice elephant you got there Jenny ;)

Viki said...

So, what's the story on how and why he had an elephant, lol.

myorii said...

Ha! This post got me good! When you mentioned your husbands *ahem* large elephant, my dirty mind was going off on all sorts of tangents :)

Not that I was really wanting to picture your husband naked or anything...because I didn't and I won't.

Seriously, though, that is one big and atrocious elephant you have to deal with! Must mean a lot to him or else it wouldn't still be hanging there (oh, bad choice of words!).

Thanks for the good laugh!

Gattina said...

Be happy he brought an elephant into your marriage and not crocodile had or another a dragon ! An elephant over an unused fireplace is very decorative ! It's the ideal place to be !
Sorry I am late but I am on holidays in Egypt and my brain is slightly damaged by the sunshine, lol !

Pondside said...

That is true love, for sure! That elephant could easily be holding up something in the garage, and there he is, evidence of wifely devotion, over the fireplace. Does Mr Jenny know how lucky he is?

Lourie said...

Jenny Matlock, you crack me up!!! BHAHAHAHAHA!

Su-sieee! Mac said...

I just stumbled upon your "E." Yay. When the E's were posted on Thursday, I saw your art piece of the elephant but for the life of me I couldn't find your post. Yay, for rainy days late nights for finally reading my feeds. Long short: Hilarious!