Friday, September 4, 2009

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"

At least that's what my Grandma used to say. And she said it a lot. To me primarily. Hmmmm....

Anyway I woke up this morning with the best intentions to let the whole bug-session thing go. I actually started to write about my back-to-school shopping trip with three year old granddaughter, Morgan, when I looked out my front window and saw...

It was the city roach patrol. Wow! I just called them yesterday. They came. They opened the manholes on our street. They sprayed. They came up to the door and handed us this. So, of course, I have to write about this instead of a cute story about Morgan calling the clothes I suggested "sgusting" (but don't get too suspensed out cuz I'll write about that soon barring any new and more "sgusting" bug-sessions)

And then they gave us the bad news.

And let me just say I hate war. War and slavery. War is bad. Slave ships were bad. War and slaveships are evil. In addition to a bazillion other reasons they are evil I am taking the myopic approach for this particular moment because THEY BOTH CAUSED ROACH INFESTATION IN THE US!!!!!

Yes, you read this right. Or at least that's what our handy little brochure AND the roach-buster guys said.

These particular roaches are called Turkestan roaches. Not be confused with American or German roaches. Turkestan roaches apparently are a lot tougher. They started infesting our country during and after the first gulf war. Is this cosmic payback for US invasion of Kuwait? (don't get political on me...I only wrote down what my husband just said - not the karmic part - just the Kuwait part)

Anyway, these little beauties (GAG) made their way back to the good old US that was already infected with cockroaches from slave ships AND WW I !!!

And since there were no roaches in the US before 1700 I can only hate slavery and war for my bug-session in addition to the other bazillion reasons. And for not letting me write about my sweet, little opinionated Morgan.

And for giving me a new bug-session for the moment. Because Turkestan roaches do not live in the sewers...they live in the ground AND according to the handy dandy brochure and one of our beautiful daughters THEY CAN FLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I have the worlds strongest intention to avoid roaches. I do. It's true. But now I have to wonder if hell has roaches? Big, old, nasty, flying Turkestan roaches? Probably. And since my Grandma was pretty sure that was where I was headed I think I just might be in trouble.



Jana said...

haha, you are sooo not going to hell, but the roaches Im sure will...yuck. I cant wait to hear the sgusting details of your shopping adventure.

Christina said...

Oh my goodness...we are cut from the same cloth, and unfortunately someone dropped us each in a roachy part of this great nation and said,"Have fun!" I've told some stories, too...and now I'm off to read of yours. Misery loves company, you know.