Thursday, December 23, 2010

In Memorium - Deep Thoughts

I shiver in the dark, cold morning house. From my front window I can see the twinkle of the neighbors Christmas lights reflected in pavement wet with overnight rain. It is beautiful and fitting for this time of reflection. Today my dearest of friends mourns the passing of her dear husband and celebrates through tears and memories a life well-lived. I shared a bit of this families story in January with this post. Kind prayers for this grieving family would be appreciated.


Little drifts of snow cover the ground. The icy earth is corduroyed with frozen foliage; unbroken by green, devoid of color.

This is a hard time. A winter time. A time when emotions cut deep and breathing becomes shallow.

This might be a time, in fact, when hearts wonder if spring will ever come again.

The bulbs and roots and rhyzomes planted over the years lie dormant. It will be months before the center of their being sends tender green shoots toward the light.

Prayers offer small relief, but they do not make the shivering stop. We read moving words by a poet that remind us, “Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. "We try, oh we try, to let that belief comfort us with the knowledge that there will be a spring again.

This is a hard time. A winter time. We shiver and wonder and doubt. And spring feels like an impossibility.

How can there be spring when the sunshine is gone? How can there be tender green shoots when we feel like the center of our being has been stolen away?

Time will pass, as it always does, whether we want it to or not.

The days will tick by on the slow-moving hands of the clock of mourning. Winter will linger and we will huddle together against the cold and against the pain of loss. We will clench our fists tightly and hold onto memories too painful to contemplate.

And one day when the sunlight slants down in a particular way, the moisture from our tears mixed with the soothing baptism of warm, spring rains, will announce to the tender bulbs and roots and rhyzomes planted over decades of devotion, that it is time to grow again.

The gentle green shoots will inch skyward and we will watch, carefully, with breath held against the possibility of more pain.

We will wait until the sunshine melts into glorious golden pools of daffodils and forsythia and the clouds drift down into fairy-tale apple blossoms and hyacinths.

We will see these amazing miracles of nature and our eyes may fill with tears. Their perfection may be painful to hearts bruised by memories.

And time will pass, as it always does, whether we want it to or not…

…until one day, we will see the tender green of a spring day, and it will be through new eyes. It will be lovely in a different way. We will tip our heads back toward the sunshine and surround our hearts with the abundant fragrance of bouquets of daffodils and lilacs.

We will release our clenched fists and let the memories of a life well-lived, a family well-loved and a man of honor, integrity and courage float in the water-color sunshine that follows a winter thaw. We will find peace.

I cannot imagine how hard it is right now to look for the light when the dawn is so very dark. Close your eyes. Lean on the love, compassion and prayers surrounding each of you until the day you are able to see the peach and pink of a spring-time dawn ready to warm your heart again.

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36 comments:

People Who Know Me Would Say: said...

Perfectly poetic - filled with love, peace, and the hope that comes from understanding the circle of life.

You are truly a brilliant wordsmith, Matlock. Truly brilliant. xo

Jules said...

Bless you.

Kat said...

This is a beautiful tribute Jenny. It feels straight from the heart, as all brilliant writing does. Prayers to Joanne and her family. I hope that the love of friends and the memories of a life well lived give them comfort. Hugs, Kat

Unknown said...

This is a wonderful post! I am so thankful your friend has a special lady like you to pray with and encourage her through a tough time.

Theresa said...

Oh Jenny, I am so sorry to hear this! I read that post about that lovely couple and that anniversary surprise in the newspaper, what a sweetheart of a fella to do that!

I will pray for Joanne and the family! I know your hearts are broken for the loss of you precious friend!

Love to you, Mr. Jenny and Joanne! HUGS!

Unknown said...

She has a very dear friend in you, sweet Jenny. This is a beautiful memorial. My prayers are with you all this day.

Slamdunk said...

Wonderful and inspiring post Jenny. They are in my prayers.

Cheryl said...

Eloquent, heartwrenching, and uplifting memorial, Jenny.

Keeping you, Steve, and Joanne in my thoughts.

Marcia said...

Jenny....my prayers go out to your friend and family. Your beautifully written words and your friendship will bring her much comfort.

I just happened upon your blog today and I truly believe I was brought to this posting for a reason. Finding your post brought me comfort and hope for a brighter day. (I lost my soul mate just 3 weeks ago). Thank you for this post and the Blessing it brought to me today.

Your newest follower…Marcia

Carol said...

Sorry for your loss, dear friend, keeping you all my my thoughts and prayers.

Mid-Atlantic Martha said...

What a beautiful post ....though this time is so sad, your post shows the kind of emotions that means this man lived a life well loved...what a wonderful legacy!

ImagiMeri said...

Dearest Jenny,

Please accept my condolences and extend them to this family in need. Many warm thoughts and wishes go to all of you touched by this man, and prayers for those in need, as well.

You are such a warm and giving person to post so dear and from the heart. God Bless this family and yours, and seek out a new star in the heavens for comfort in the future.

Hugs and love,
Meri

Busy Bee Suz said...

Prayers to your friend and the family...and for you. Your heart is the size of eternity.
xoxo

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Blessings to your friend and her family and to you dear Jenny. A sad time!

Pondside said...

I remember that post from earlier this year, Jenny. I am so sorry that your friend has lost her dear husband and that you and Steve have lost a dear friend. My sister is going through the same thing with her dear friend, who will probably not live through the season. As I pray for her, I'll remember your friend and her family. xo

Life in Rehab said...

We just brought my mother-in-law's ashes home. Loss near the holidays is especially poignant, and this story is a wonderful share. Thank you.

Ames said...

Beautifully written Jenny! Sorry to hear of your friend's passing. I know you will miss him and his wife will too! I will keep her, and you, in my prayers. May peace be like the pure white snow, every flake being a prayer to comfort. Big hugs!~Ames

Dana @ Bungalow'56 said...

I had not read the earlier post Jenny. So with a few tears I am writing here to say yes, he was a scholar, as he had the wisdom to give Joanne the most beautiful gift with that announcement. How wonderful for her to have shared 46 years with him. Many people never know this kind of love. Those that do? Are truly blessed.
Dana

Rebecca S. said...

It is so important to remember that not everyone finds this time of year easy and delightful, so thank you for this. Oh, the great wisdom and healing process of the earth's seasons as fact and symbol of something greater...truly miraculous! Wishing you and your family and friends peace.

Tina said...

What a loving and moving tribute to a great friend. I will keep you and your friend in my prayers.

Susan Anderson said...

Wonderful, wonderful thoughts, and beautifully written.

I know your friend will feel your support through this time, and I also know that she is fortunate to have such a caring soul in her corner.

Hugs to you all.

J said...

This was beautiful, Jenny. You're a great writer.

I'll definitely be sending prayers out to the family.

Carrie @ Cottage Cozy said...

Thanks for sharing that lovely story!

Merry Merry Christmas! May your stocking be filled with blessings!

Hugs, Carrie

RNSANE said...

How very sad for your friend to lose her husband, especially at this time of year, Jenny. My thoughts and prayers go out to her and her family and to you and yours as her friends.

gayle said...

You have a wonderful way with words! Sorry to hear about your loss!

Pat Tillett said...

Beautiful and so sad...
You are so talented...

summersundays-jw said...

My husband died 2 yrs ago in Jan. & I had so many people ask me how I did it. He died so young & certainly didn't want to go that I knew how selfish it would be if I didn't take advantage of my life. I'm so sorry for you & your friend. Jan

Anonymous said...

Such a touching piece.

Teresa

Dee said...

I am so sad for your friend. I pray the Lord will blanket her with peace. Have a Merry Christmas Jenny and thank you so much for writing such an interesting blog that brings a smile to my day. Dee

Unknown said...

I am so sorry for your friend, she and her family will be in my thoughts!

Melinda said...

Lovely thoughts. Prayers for your
friend.

Melinda

Judie said...

Kahlil Gibran once wrote,"The deeper sorrow carves itself into your being, the more joy you can contain."

mrs. c said...

Sweet memories are what get us through the dark times. I tried to post on Alphabe but I could not. Have a Happy Christmas.

Unknown said...

I remember that post very well. Please know his family are in my thoughts and prayers.

~Andrea~

Auntie sezzzzzz... said...

My heart goes out to your dear friend... -sigh-

Gentle Christmas hugs...

The Words Crafter said...

This is stunningly beautiful.....