A few weeks ago my garbage disposal died.
Mr. Jenny told me he was going to try and fix it himself.
While I waited and worried over his future repair, I managed...
...although sticking my hand down in that gaping hole to retrieve mistakenly scraped in leftovers wasn't too pleasant.
Finally, I protested.
"Fix it, or I'm getting it replaced," I told him huffily.
He tried to fix it.
There was swearing. There was pounding. Finally, he said, "Okay, I can't fix it. Let's replace it!"
I was ready to call the handy man we usually use and head to Home Depot.
"Not so fast," Mr. Jenny intervened. "Remember that store we went to where they sell used appliances? I know I saw used garbage disposals there, let's run over and look."
"Hmmm...I don't think garbage disposals are very expensive. Why don't we just get a new one?"
"No," he quickly replied, "I think we can get a really, really powerful one there and it will be dirt cheap."
Rolling my eyes (to myself, of course!) I got into the car. We went to the store. It was hot in there. No air conditioning.
...they had four used garbage disposals.
"Are you sure this will fit?" I enquired crankily, as he proudly carried his prize to the check out counter.
Obviously, he was sure because we left, sweating profusely, a short time later...bearing a "GEEZ!!! THIS IS ONLY 25 DOLLARS!" appliance.
Our handyman guy showed up to install it.
He efficiently tore out the old one and tried to put the new 'used' one in.
He efficiently told Mr. Jenny it wouldn't fit.
I efficiently kept quiet.
Mr. Jenny went and bought a new garbage disposal, while he paid the handyman guy to sit and wait.
I giggled quietly to myself.
Thirty minutes later I was the proud owner of a garbage disposal...
(Please don't feel compelled to buy me a Hallmark card for this happy event! Thanks for the thought, though.)
Forty-five minutes later our garbage can was the proud recipient of two used garbage disposals...
...and two hours after that I was happily grinding up garbage.
You might be wondering if there is a moral to this story or if I'm going to segue into some emotional connection between processing garbage and the irony of life.
I'm only telling you this story because I have a pathetic life.
Pathetic and boring.
And getting a new garbage disposal was the high point of my weekend.
Okay, go ahead.
I deserve it.
And listen. To thank you for reading this, if you have any garbage you need ground up, feel free to drop by.