A few weeks ago Mr. Jenny told me he wanted me to go to the annual accountants meeting with him.
I whined. "Why do I have to go? I don't wanna go?"
And Mr. Jenny told me in an authorative voice, "You will go, woman!"
Okay, technically he didn't say that. He saying something like, "You've been working with these people on the phone for awhile now and I think it's a good idea for you to meet them."
I whined some more.
On Tuesday I tried to wiggle out of it. Seriously. I had a long list of wayyyy better things to do. I'm not sure what they were, but anything sounded better than listening to people talk about ACCOUNTING!
I see you nodding your head in agreement. Yeah. But where were you when I needed an ally to avoid going in the first place.
I got in the car.
I griped for awhile.
I whined for awhile.
And finally I just shut up, because it seemed like Mr. Jenny could care less about my obvious emotional distress over potential boredom.
But when we got to the office the two women we work with were super nice and friendly and I took my legal pad in with me so I could doodle while they talked.
Don't look appalled, please. I kept the tablet up at an angle and looked studious so everyone thought I was just taking notes.
Actually, it's not the end.
I wish it was.
While I was doodling away and looking intelligent and interested I got a cramp or a pinched nerve or something...in my hip...
I get them sometimes...and there is always screaming involved.
I got one.
I jumped up out of the chair.
I started biting my hand to keep from screaming really loud.
I told Mr. Jenny, "OMG! OMG! HELP ME!" and began hobbling out of the room as quickly as I could go.
Mr. Jenny (having had the joy and pleasure of experiencing these intense and painful attacks before) joined me immediately.
I was still biting my hand and groaning and trying not to start screaming. I hobbled toward an open door. It was a supply closet. Mr. Jenny came in with my and closed the door while I kind of flayed about gasping and trying not to make too much noise until the pain finally passed.
So, after a few minutes he said, "Are you okay?" and I nodded in exhaustion.
And he opened the door and I hobbled back out.
Our accountant and her assistant were standing in the open doorway of her office looking shocked.
They were speechless.
I hobbled by them and sat back down.
I picked up my legal pad.
I swear, their mouths were still open.
Mr. Jenny sat down and calmly said, "It's okay, she gets those sometimes."
Two days later I can now giggle about it, but at the time, I was so freakin' embarrassed.
They just kept looking at me.
"Ummm....I'm sorry," I said, "Sometimes I get these really bad cramps and ummm... it's all fine now...ummm..."
The assistant sort of ran out of the room and returned with some water. "Would you like some aspirin? Or something? Or..."
I waved her away with my hand, "Really, I'm just fine...let's just finish this up."
I tried doodling again but they were both watching me intently...waiting for another 'episode', I guess.
So I was forced to listen to talk of ammortization schedules and dumb stuff like that. WITHOUT DOODLING!
Finally, finally the meeting concluded and I got up carefully and kind of hobbled to the door of the suite of offices.
I swear, they still look worried.
Mr. Jenny held my arm and helped me up to the car.
And when we got in I told him, "I told you I didn't want to go!"
And Mr. Jenny, bless his heart, just answered quietly, "Okay, maybe next time you can just stay home."
PS. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALLIE!