...but first...the prelude.
On the twelth day before Christmas,
My neighbor brought to me
12 pieces of toffee
Which to be polite I had to quickly eat.
On the eleventh day before Christmas
I received in my morning mail
11 festive fruitcakes
which I ate and still lived to tell the tale.
On the tenth day before Christmas
I found by my front door
10 pans of fudge, thank goodness
there wasn't 11 cuz I couldn't have eaten any more!
On the ninth day before Christmas
I waddled to the table
To find 9 bowls of hershey kisses
which I ate to please my favorite cousin Mabel.
On the eighth day before Christmas
My husband said "oh ick,
please eat these 8 banana breads
Because frankly I feel sick!"
On the seventh day before Christmas
A box came UPS
Containing 7 sugar cookies
Which put my sweet tooth to the test!
On the sixth day before Christmas
My Mother brought to me,
6 pieces of peanut brittle
which she made me eat right beside the Christmas tree.
On the fifth day before Christmas
I ATE FIVE GOLDEN REESES!
On the 4th day before Christmas
My daughter said to me
"Mom, I'm coming over to bring you
4 special Christmas sweets!"
On the third day before Christmas
I had a terrible stomachache,
But then my son showed up
with 3 special Christmas cakes!
On the second day before Christmas,
I was feeling slightly frownie,
When my very sweet nephew Tom
brought over two big pans of brownies!
On the last day before Christmas
I was in a sugar coma
When our dear friends Steve and Cyndie
Brought us a bag of Christmas donuts!
On the actual day of Christmas
my mouth said to my eyes
I'm sure it's not gonna hurt to eat
just one more piece of pie!
So now, on the first day after Christmas
My jeans say to my tummy,
"Time to get on a diet,
eating Christmas cheer ain't funny!"
Sigh. But not too big cuz I can't really exhale very far at the moment.
PS I just cracked up when I went to one of the blogs I follow cuz here's what Julie posted!
E is for Exsanguination
2 hours ago