Friday, July 30, 2010

Listen...I need a favor...


I am all kinds of frustrated with this whole computer spammer black-list nightmare ALTHOUGH today in sheer desperation I called Cox's Corporate offices in Atlanta, Georgia and asked to talk to the CEO of the company. It's true. The receptionist girl (who, by the way, spoke perfect English) asked what my call was in regards to and I told her I was being black-listed by her company and I wanted someone to fix it. "Oh," she said in a sweet Georgia drawl, "You're going to want to talk to Mark about that," and she transferred me.

Not 30 minutes later, a very sweet sounding Southern man called me back. It wasn't Mark but I didn't care. Andrew was all kinds of helpful and looked at all my records and all my complaints and told me how to try and get help and he told me I could use his name and he would call me back and cool stuff like that.

But because of the error message I keep getting, I first needed to be sure there was no "bot" or "virus" stuff on my computer. I used a cool tech guy who remotely operated my computer for almost the entire afternoon and poked around trying to find bad things inside my computer.(Why can't people clean my house remotely is what I'd like to know?)

He found a few things and fixed them but the e-mail problem persists. Arrrggghhh!

So now I will continue with step two of finding out what is wrong tomorrow ...

So...

I am totally behind in everything from e-mails to Alphabe-Thursday to Saturday Centus. And I must also add that even though I can sometimes get e-mails out, most of them come back blocked from your service because I am a .... gulp .... spammer.

I hope you can continue to be patient with me.

But that's not the favor.

Here's the favor.

I don't know about you, but when I am majorly stressed out over stuff like this I want to eat sweet stuff ... for some reason I think ingesting these caloric treats will make me feel better. And while I am heroicly resisting the siren call of carbs for comfort, I have an idea that will help make it easier.

Since Buffy and I parted ways last Sunday I have been UNABLE TO EAT CHICKEN! It's true. I just can't do it. I picked it out of a casserole earlier in the week. I couldn't even make Mr. Jenny a left-over chicken salad sandwich because the whole idea just weirded me out.

So what I need from you guys is to let me watch your bakery and/or chocolate shop for several weeks.

I'm certain if I do this I will "bond" with the sweets and then become unable to eat them.

This seems like a perfect solution to my stress-induced sweet cravings.

Dontcha think?

So, listen... I can start really soon, especially if you are willing to let me use your e-mail while I'm sugar-sitting.

And because you'll be doing me a big favor I will be happy to watch your store for FREE!

Yes, you heard me correctly.

For two weeks I will watch your bakery and/or chocolate shop and use your e-mail at absolutely no charge to you.

What a deal!

And although your comment or your e-mail letting me know how soon you need me to be at your shop will probably get to me...

I can't get a message back to you.

So...here's what I'm thinking. If you look toward the Arizona horizon you will be able to see smoke signals sending my reply back to you.
I feel a lot better now!

I love it when a plan comes together!

Sigh...

post signature

45 comments:

Wanda..... said...

Jenny you are so resourceful...trying to get sweets any way you can... you were just over here stealing my cookies, wasn't that enough for you(the baked kind, not the computer kind)!

Cheryl said...

I've got a Sweet Shop on FB through St. Judes Hospital. It's got lots of yummy stuff. You're welcome to watch that if you'd like. I also have an account that's loaded with sweetbucks that you can spend on everything your carb-lovin' heart desires. Course it's all virtual food, but hey, it's better than nothing. Right?

Ace said...

LOL...I would GLADLY let you watch my sweetshop and/or bakery. 'Cause if you're watching them I won't be with them and I won't be eating them. If your theory is right it's win-win.

5thsister said...

Ha...maybe I should watch a wine shop! Might help me with my expensive habit

Oh, come on by...I have some leftover brownies my daughter made.

Theresa said...

Dang Jenny, you're in a mess! Couldn't you just change email providers? Just ditch the other one! Anyway, come watch my sweet shop! Keep your hands off of the chocolate covered donuts with sprinkles... those are mine!

Have a blessed day and find something to do since you can't compute:)

Deb said...

oh Jenny you've had quite a week..hope it gets better soon...

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Willoughby said...

"Carbs of comfort". Love it! I've been known to medicate with carbs, myself.

Hang in there, I hope you get this ridiculous email situation worked out!

Kim @ Savvy Southern Style said...

Oh, you bad spammer you. I hope you get it all worked out. Try to have a good weekend and step back from the carbs and chocolate.

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Oh Dear Jenny! You really must have pissed-off the "Great Computer Godessssssss In The Sky" this time! -le sigh- My email was only blocked, like over night. Now how un-fair is that hu?

Anyone in Pretty Blog Land knows that I do more pissing-off of everyone, let alone of the "Great Computer Godessssssss In The Sky," than you do! But you, Sweet You, are being singled out for this horrendous treatment!

Awful!

Awful!

Awful!

-repeat le sigh-

But! Your idea of bonding with sweets for a couple of weeks, to throw you off your desssssssssire for sweets, is a good plan! Hey, one of those diet plans I once read a book on said... Do that! Buy and stock your kitchen with a huge amount of your favorite "Sinful Delight." Get in loads and loads of it.

Then eat it, any time you are hungry and want it. Give yourself permission to do so! Eventually, you'll get so sick of the deeeeeeelicious Sinful Decadence, that you'll NOT want it, anymore.

Let us know how it works. Oh and yes, the plan said that there would be some weight gain, at first. But not to worry. You'd eventually get sick of the food and stop eating it. It said..... But no, I am NOT guaranteeing it!

Good luck!!!

-gigggles-

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

I say/pronounce "Goddesssssssssssss," like Meg Ryan pronounced it, in "French Kiss." Remember? I've never been able to say that word, any other way, ever since first viewing of "French Kiss." :-)))))))))

Vintage Christine said...

Methinks you got a little spam right here--best schools in INDIA???!!! I become spam occasionally thru Hotmail but I've never had the problem you have. Hope you get it cleared up and good luck with bakery-sitting!

Jules said...

What a mess you have there. Time for a new computer????

BECKY said...

Watch my favorite bakery, for free, you say?! Hmmm...what's in it for me?!

Cassie said...

Jenny, I empathize with your situation....but quite frankly I think it's time for a confrontation....anybody with me?
Problem is, I'm not sure which 12-step program we'd take you to!!

Hang in there!

Sami said...

You are more than welcome to watch one or more of our copious amounts of sweets shops here! Sampling is permitted, and encouraged!!

I think someone's trying to frame you as a spammer, like in those mystery novels! Ooooo... we might have to call in Jessica Fletcher to help! (Sadly, did you know I had to google 'old lady that solves mysteries tv show' to remember the name of the show was Murder, She Wrote? ARGH!)

Jeanie said...

I have had some minor computer problems this week, so you have my sympathy with your big mess.
I hate to rain on your parade, but I have my doubts about how well your sweet shop sitting plan would work. I owned a bakery many years ago and and both then, and to this day, I never met a donut I didn't like. But then, maybe I just don't "bond" with my charges as well as you do.

Paula said...

I feel your pain Jenny! I too have had a week of computer issues! I found the best help at bleepingcomputer.com ... these guys were awesome!
good luck, I'm looking west for the smoke signals!!

Carol said...

You make me laugh...and it's not even intentional! Now, I have a twisted mind...with twisted friends....we call our 'spare tire' our 'bakery' cause we got rolls! I am sitting here giggling thinking you wanna 'watch my bakery'....{giggle} I need more coffee...excuse me!

edenhills said...

I thought my blog being shut down because I was labeled as a spammer was bad, but that got corrected after just six days. You have my heartfelt sympathy. I hope it gets better because you are so not spam. I don't have a sweet shop, but I did post my zucchini brownie recipe because I am an expert at how to make something good for you unhealthy.

Teresa

Jingle said...

be easy,

my way of doing things:
no emails, emails lead to gossips and take lots of time...

I only do public commenting and blogging, which keep or force me to be positive and focused...

people are different, best wishes for you.

Sue said...

Sadly, my sweet shop/bakery is as bare as Mother Hubbard's cupboard. (I went off my diet while at the beach this week.)

But I will offer a sacrifice to the computer gods in your behalf.

=)

PS. I do what I can.

Pondside said...

Jenny, please let me know if the bonding-with-sweets thing works. If so, I would like to suggest a partnership to develop a franchise that would rival any of the diet centre sorts of franchise. We'll have people lined up to sign on with us - and I am copy writing this comment so that no one steals the franchise idea. We'll cover the North American market and move to Europe - I'll be glad to do the European bakery research - you can do the far east (I can't stand soy bean paste candy, myself). Please let me know, by smoke signal or pony express or telegram - I won't move on this without you.

Chatty Crone said...

You need to be a stand up comedian!

I will help you work at the bakery shops if you don't mind - I need help too.

Will look up for smoke signals.

sandie

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Since I was to be your first 'franchise' in the chicken sitting business I need to help you with this new venture. If it made me bond with the doughnuts and not want to eat them...well sign me up. I am in the Atlanta area so if you need me to go to the corporate office and say fix this or else just let me know...via smoke signals of course!

Pixie said...

Awww poor darlin' *HUGS*

Nezzy said...

I too have a most definably sweet tooth and have been tryin' to stay off the sugar to up my immune systen so I can get rid of these stinkin' shingles. I fear starin' at all those goodies temptation would get the best of me and I'd end up jumpin' in the display case! Whew....breathe in....breathe out!

Your too funny girl! Have a fantastically blessed weekend sweetie!!!

Christy said...

okay...i am a technical dolt..but i came across this yesterday as i was trying to link to somebody's site...
http://www.spamhaus.org/
it might be worth seeing if this will work for you...not sure...especially since cox is being difficult..
Yesterday i had a house full of cakes and cupcakes and all things sweet. i do find that having sweets around does make me want to eat that particular sweet less...but not all sweets. unfortunately, i don't think it works the same as chicken :(

Country Dreaming said...

My dear Jenny girl--
My techy guy (Mr Ken) says that you may need to rebuild your computer (whoa deep breath) because
if your machine is sending out spam
and you aren't the one then it may be your machine. Check with your techy dude.

Hope all goes well.

Melinda

One Mama said...

Oh, I feel so bad about your email drama! If it helps, this comment requires no response! LOL By the way, I worked at a bakery for two years and never got tired of eating the goodies!

Amy said...

First off, you A-Team quote has me grinning from ear to ear. We may be a little obsessed at my house.

Can I come help you sugar-sit? I need to get over my problem as well. I ate a whole container of ice cream last night due to stress. I think we could be great partners! And you are welcome to my email while we are sugar-sitting together. I will bring my laptop and we will have all kinds of fun spamming... er, emailing our friends. :) Watching for your smoke signal reply now.

Sue (Someone's Mom) said...

Well I certainly hope you can still read blogs, because if you read mine today...you will feel better. You will also see your name mentioned (no, you didn't win anything) and reading your post proves I was right in what I said about you:) How can you resist visiting me now?

Wendy said...

You are the only person I know who can take a frustrating situation and tell it in a story that has me smiling at the end! How did you do that?
Aghhh...that spam thing must be so frustrating. I get all confused with this computer stuff. Hope it gets fixed for you soon! Have fun bonding with your sweets :)
Wendy

mrs. c said...

I wish that I could let you fly to Tennessee and watch Rembrandt's. It is my favorite sweetie place! Coconut Macaroons, Lemon Tarts and chocolate candy to die for! Maybe that would help you with your love of chocolate.

The Words Crafter said...

I love the not eating chicken part, how sweet :) And I laughed out loud at the sincere offer to watch a sweet shop, you're so kind! With me, it wouldn't work. I'm ADHD and a little OCD...I would have to eat the uneven or odd sweets-need even amounts, or I'd have to eat the misshapen ones, or the ones with smudges....rationalization-the tool for addicts! Good luck with the email thing. My email just sends anything strange to a folder and lets me decide whether to keep it or not....

Aging Mommy said...

My family all come from Birmingham in England which was the original home of Cadbury chocolate and several of my mother's sister's worked when young at the chocolate factory. Cadbury's policy (horrendous to think of today with all the hygiene laws) was that employees could eat as much chocolate as they wanted when working. Why? Because they knew that after a couple of weeks no one would ever want to eat any more. So I think two weeks in a cake shop would cure you for sure :-) Maybe I need to apply for a short term job at Ben & Jerry's......

Janiece said...

I think I am still in shock that you really got to speak to a real human ...
I don't know if I would be able to eat chicken either...

Pat @ Mille Fiori Favoriti said...

Oh no -- I can't believe your ISP has you tagged as a spammer! That's horrible and so annoying and inconvienient, I'm sure. I hope that you get it all ironed out soon. Maybe if you ask everyone to add your e-mail address to their address books your comments and e-mails won't be tagged as spam but friendly mail? I have you in my address book!

Good luck Jenny! It's always something!

Unprocessed1 said...

It just so happens I'm in need of a donut assistant - doesn't pay anything but all the donuts you can eat!

A match made in heaven!

BECKY said...

Hi Sue! I'm visiting via Jenny's blog! I just couldn't resist what you said in your comment. See, it DID work! And you were just as interesting and funny as Jenny, too! Really! Jenny's my pal, so I know she wouldn't mind me saying that, either. You turned a sad, frustrating situation into something quite humorous! This was my absolute favorite line and I laughed out loud: "You know you are getting old when you injure yourself sleeping."
Hilarious!! And I know what you mean!! Hope you have a wonderful weekend!!

Cheryl D. said...

Not a bad idea, but I see smoke signals all the time. I live in Los Angeles!

My computer got hacked today. I suspect it was through my blogger account, because someone emailed me to tell me they tried to post on my blog 5 times, but couldn't, so they emailed me directly. After that, I received bounced emails or friends asking why I was trying to sell they viagra or herpes meds. LOL

My name is PJ. said...

I'm firsthand familiar with easing stress with carbs....

I hope that computer situation is rectified soon. No carb tastes as good as good health.


-1.2

Fresh Local and Best said...

Oh.My.Gosh! I hope that this gets fixed soon. Frustrating!
Fortunately the material provided for an incredibly funny post.

Lourie said...

Jenny, I love your idea of sugar sitting. But I can honestly tell you having worked at the Jelly Belly Factory there are very few candies I won't eat. Maybe it's just me. Perhaps I am simply a heathen. I mean I still eat fish even though I have had several fish for pets. Maybe I am the wrong person to talk to about this. I sure hope you get your email up and running normally! What a serious pain this is for you.

Personalized Sketches and Sentiments said...

um..I'm glad to hear that you seem to have it all worked out! or at least that you have a plan in place :o) Although I still don't quite get how sugar-sitting has anything to do with the plan...but then again, my thought processes are sometimes on the slow side!

Blessings & Aloha!