Wednesday, July 28, 2010

A thwarted dream...

When I was a young girl I always wanted to be an entomologist.

And just because a dream is difficult doesn't mean you shouldn't attempt to achieve it.

My particular aspiration was made even more complicated by the simple fact that I totally hated bugs.

But dream I did.

I wanted to wear the cool hat.

I wanted to carry the cool magnifying glass.

I just didn't want the bugs.

And in my entomology-wannabe training I learned a lot of things.

I learned, for instance, that this is a cockroach...

And I learned, for instance, that this is NOT a cockroach. This is a black rock.


However...

I'm wondering if extremely myopic entomologists ever go on to become great in their fields.

Because...

If, for instance, an extremely myopic entomologist were to encounter, say, a black rock left in the shower stall by a grandchild...
And then the poor, terrified entomologist were to start screaming like an idiot and cause Mr. Entomologist to rush into the bathroom prepared for blood and mayhem only to encounter a terrified Mrs. Entomologist cowering in the corner of the bathroom screaming for someone, anyone to kill the huge cockroach...

Well...

Do you think they would last long in their entomology dream?

I think...

Perhaps...

...they would not...

Not that this particular scenario has ever happened to me, but it could if possibly one day a Granddaughter would leave a cockroach shaped rock in the bathroom and if I encountered this rock without my glasses on I could, conceivably, think it was a roach and could, conceivably, scream like an idiot until Mr. Jenny gave me my glasses so I could see that it was only a black rock.

And this is just conjecture. This totally would never happen to me because I can totally tell the difference between a black rock and a cockroach.

So any resemblance to any instances like this with persons living or dead would just be a total coincidence because I would never, ever give Mr. Jenny a heart attack by doing something like this to him.

And…

Huh?

No…

No, you can’t have his e-mail address or his office phone number. He doesn’t need to be bothered verifying if something like this has ever happened at our house on a Monday night.

He is a busy, busy man.

But, I will leave you with this deep thought.

Dreams.

They die hard sometimes.

And I think I am finally willing to admit I will probably not ever be a bug scientist in this lifetime.

Sigh...

PS. Still working through e-mail issues so don't feel ignored. I still like you. Even if you aren't an entomologist.

post signature

50 comments:

Theresa said...

Well, since my last name is "Roach", I am somewhat offended:) Enjoy your day, my advice is wear your glasses so you can tell the difference in the big black rock and the giant cockroach!

Take a sip of something this morning, I think you need it!

HUGS!

Terry said...

Wow! That could have been a reallly traumatic experience for you, I mean for a person, IF it ever really happened! ROFL

5thsister said...

Oh Jenny...can I come live with you for a little while? I sure could use some more laughter in my life!

(I can so relate as without my specs I would have thought the grandbaby left a "present", not that my kids ever did anything like that when they were being potty trained...)

Cheryl said...

Wow. One more reason not to live in the scary SW. Eek! I'm laughing with you not at you.

Wanda..... said...

Yes...I'm totally convinced this 'NEVER' happened to you. What else do you want me to believe?
♥...Wanda

linda said...

Eeeeeeeuuuuuuuwwwww!

LOL
You are one funny lady.
Thanks for the early morning giggle.

Jocelyn said...

Oh giggle and giggle some more....I must admit..I have been in the house...alone and some awful bug appears and looks at me like...haha lady...it's me and you!!! I try to scoop and run for the door...screaming in panic and poor Miss Cosmo wants a new home...she thinks I am a crazy lady!!!!

I do remember the day a spider was on my Danielle...grown up daughter two children and she was screaming and tearing her clothes off in her living room...the spider had jumped down her shirt....not funny...but funny!!!

Love ya girlie!!!

Julie Schuler said...

I'm the same way without my glasses! I suspect every unusual blot or blob to me a menacing insect.

Kat said...

I think that your hypothesis is correct. That person would not last long as an entomologist. Another hypothesis. A woman hanging clothes on the line in Lousiana, upon feeling something hop on her back and turning her head ever so slightly and seeing a lizard perched on her shoulder, who then proceeds to tear her shirt off in broad daylight and run screaming into the house. That person would probably not make a good herpetologist. Not that I know anyone personally who has ever done this (cough, cough MOM), but just saying. Kat

Theresa said...

Too funny! (and perfectly understandable how a rock could be mistaken for a bug!)

Jeanie said...

Or it could have turned out to be a very dangerous rock.

The Quintessential Magpie said...

You and I would be a fine pair. I see things without my glasses on, too, Jenny. They take on a life of their own sometimes, but not as proven by the rock that is NOT a cockroach that you didn't see and about which you did NOT scream and scare Mr. Jenny.

XO,

Sheila :-)

Aging Mommy said...

I cannot stand cockroaches and being extremely myopic myself would, should such a thing ever happen which clearly it didn't, but if my daughter were to leave a big black rock in my shower then I would scream blue murder too :-)

Sami said...

Bugs... bugs... eww... I know they're good for -something- other than freaking me out, like birdy snacks or fertilizing plants. But UGH. They still give me the heebie jeebies! Especially when they show up in my HOUSE!! Bllaaahh... I would have fainted dead away if I saw that rock :)

amelia said...

Many is the time I've saved a piece of fluff from the bathtub because I don't have my glasses on in the shower!! I carefully place it on my hanging towel then find out, when I get out, that my 'spider' is a piece of fluff!!

I've saved small bits of wood and various vegetation this way too!! :)

summersundays-jw said...

I've learned that after my 3 have been here, I should always wear glasses and my shoes -- especially in the bathroom since one of the girls loves to play with a collection of big ole creepy spiders in the bathtub. Thanks for the laugh. Jan

Pondside said...

I detest bugs, but they love me. Spiders have been known to make a full turn to scramble towards me (to take a bite).
In your defense - that rock really could have been a huge roach, with its legs tucked under, ready for a shower....that is, if this incident had happened to you.

Jingle said...

dreams do die hard at times,
wise words.
smiles, wishing you a beautiful day!

Linda @ A La Carte said...

I am so glad this NEVER happened because if it did I would so be laughing and I never want to offend you by laughing at you, with you yes! But of course this never happened so that's that!! :)

Terri said...

I used to have a hissing cockroach as a classroom pet. He was adorable. Really.

Darn email. You might have to go to India and talk to someone in person.

Kari said...

Dang how big are your cockroaches? Can they stay in your part of town. I. Do. Not. Want. Them. Well I bet you were wide awake after that!

Busy Bee Suz said...

I think your grand kids are trying to scare the bejeesus out of you. :)

Tina said...

I completely get this. I also have bad vision, and have made it a habit to put my contacts in before I shower...and to nap with them in. Don't want to freak out a budding entomologist...but there's a large, 8 -legged reason for this...shudder.

LuLu Kellogg said...

Oooooooo, now I have the itchies!

LuLu♥

Aunt LoLo said...

I. Love. Your. Blog.

I don't comment often, because I'm lame-o like that, and assume that you KNOW you're awesome.

but...yeah. You crack me up. :-)

maggie said...

Maybe you could still get the hat, would that have any satisfaction?
Too funny! What creeps me out is when, withour my glasses on, I pick up 'stuff' off the rug and it turns out to be a live wiggling bug and I totally overreact like it could eat me up or something. You've got the gift lady. You brighten many a heart.

Pixie said...

LOL don't feel too bad...I'm just as blind, if not more blind without my glasses!

fuzziekit said...

I had a dream of being an archeologist (thank you Indiana Jones) and well I have a healthy fear of spiders (fascinating but creepy critters). So the dream did not progress much past a dream due to the amount of spider webs I know would exist down in some dead guys tomb. Though when some inch and a half long (legs included) brown spider popped out of a bag that I was putting away in the trunk of my car. I calmly screamed and backed away, shuttering, before managing to move said bag to the ground and shooing out said spider. Upon refection... it might have been a brown recluse, since it was a type spider I have never seen before. Of course I could be wrong... I hope I was wrong.

Amy said...

Hilarious! The things you think you see when you aren't wearing your glasses, right? Crazy. So glad that this scenario didn't actually happen. That would be pretty embarrassing.

Serline said...

I'm not a cockroach fan myself either. My hubby loves to tell the story of the kamikaze roach that landed on my chest while we were sauntering home at 1am from a night out. Imagine the bloodcurdling scream that woke 50,000 people up in the neighborhood...

Marlene said...

Good heavens...I thought the blurred object was a log...you know.

I think I would have rather seen a log than a giant cucharacha, though!

jeff campbell said...

Tough to be an entomologist and hate insects ;-) I'll be one for you and you can live out your fantasies vicariously through me...I wish you wouldn't 'bug' us with this nonsense ;-) Peace and blessings

Maggie S said...

You, Lady, are a very gifted storyteller. And a cotton-frappin' scream.

C.L. Smith said...

You've done it again, Jenny! What a funny story (did I mention that almost every DAY I think I'm seeing a bug in the shower because I don't have my contacts in! Most times it's one of the black magnets on the back of the shower curtain...pretty pathetic, I know.)

Loved this one :-)

Sue said...

It was the day I mistook a bowl of yellow rubber bands for scrambled eggs (san my specs) that I, too, had to give up my childhood dream of entomology.

Strange how our lives have run such parallel courses.

=)

Cheryl D. said...

Funny as always! The college I went to had the number 1 entomology department in the country when I went there! It was hilarious! That school was located in some dark, cockroach-infested basement. They had a wall of pictures, showing the professors for that area; their pictures covered by a sheet of plastic. Anyway, the students there loved to pound the plastic ans smoosh the cockroaches onto the professors' pictures! LOL! So, if you were looking at the pictures. You'd see all these smooshed cockroaches on the entomology department professors' faces. Really hilarious! And disgusting!

Andrea said...

I would scream my head off too if I thought that rock was that GIANT cockroach!! I live in Texas and I have never seen a roach that big! EEEEEEKKKKKK!

I got an email from you, so I feel special.

Michelle said...

What's even more fun is the black little rubber mouse toy that my preschooler leaves lying around the house in random places. I've screamed, thinking "Mousie" was real...and grabbed for a real one thinking it was just Mousie...

If I saw something I thought was a roach that big, I would not be screaming. I'd be huddled in a whimpering heap waiting for the guys in white coats.

Jo said...

In theory ... Mr. Jenny has a darn strong heart ... cuz i think you have given him palpitations on several occasions ... of course this is only in theory .... right???

The Words Crafter said...

This kind of thing has never happened to me lots of times....and afterwards, it's never hilarious because it didn't happen in the first place, so my husband never has to turn away laughing at my non-silliness....if I DID see that rock in the shower, the neighbors would have been dialing 911!

Willoughby said...

I can totally relate! I'm phobic about bugs, any bugs, being in the house. If I see a piece of dark lint on the living room rug I always assume it's some creeping, crawling creature. If I had seen that rock in the shower, I'd have screamed, too!!

laterg8r said...

i hate bugs - i'd have screamed too :D

Annesphamily said...

Hee Hee! You can make me laugh Jenny, all the time. You are one cool chick. Anne

Vicki said...

LAUGHING SO HARD IT HURTS!!

I can just see this happening :)

OuCh, still hurts..

Jennifer said...

You crack me up.
But the cockroach almost did the reverse...

Chatty Crone said...

I hate hate hate those things! YUCK! sandie

Velvet Over Steel said...

I can so so seeing this happening to me! Not you of course, but me most certainly. I so need my glasses... everything is just a tiny bit to... well tiny! :-)

Great post, thank you for the laughter tonight! :-)
Hugs,
Coreen

Melinda Cornish said...

I almost believe you wanted to be an entomologist when you were a kid....almost....

Lourie said...

Definitely looks like a roach! Definitely.

gayle said...

This is so funny!! It brings to mind the other day ( I should have posted about it....Never even thought) I went on my poarch and thought I saw a big piece of trash and was about to pick it up.........It was a tiny dead mouse that Fancie Cat brought me as a present. If I had picked it up bare handed I would have probably had a heart attack.