Monday, July 12, 2010

Three girls and a moderately hostile chicken...

Bloggers, meet Buffy.
Buffy, meet Bloggers!

SQUAWWWWWKKKKKK!!!!!!!

I'm not a chicken psychologist but I don't think Buffy is a very happy chicken. You might recall she lost four sisters in one tragic pre-chicken-sitting accident.

I'm pretty sure it was the heat. It was 113 degrees for several days in a row and Buffy's sisters were all quite dark colored. I suspect Buffy might be adopted but there is no way I'm telling her that in her current grumpy state.
When we went to see Buffy on Friday she was not impressed that she was being tended by a Princess. ... and was not that thrilled with the three feather-less chicken imposters in her yard. However, Buffy got a lot friendlier when bribed with cut up Mt. Rainer cherries. I would get a lot friendlier if someone cut the pits out of my cherries, too.

After the bribery with the fruit Buffy decided she would kinda/sorta tolerate us as long as we didn't actually touch her. The last two mornings I have visited Buffy sans the three feather-less non-chicken imposters and Buffy has been much nicer.

She was quite annoyed that I did not bring her cherries, though. She let me know through squawks and flapping wings that cut-up grapes were not to her liking. The whole incorrect fruit thing really got her clucked up!

She calmed down a lot when I told her I had a great recipe for chicken pie.

And even more when I told I was sorry that her sisters had chosen to wimp out of the Arizona heat and get the flock out of there.

I tried telling her a few chicken jokes to cheer her up even more but she was pretty non-responsive even to my favorite one: Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road ? Because he didn't have enough guts!

But perhaps that was slightly insensitive in light of Buffy's recent loss.

And now that this post has almost totally laid an egg, I'll sign off with a special message from Buffy.

SQUAWWWWWKKKKKK!!!!!!!SQUAWWWWWKKKKKK!!!!!!!

Which translates from Squawk Talk to mean...

"Bring me some cherries...or the chicken sitter gets the axe!"

Sigh...

post signature

49 comments:

5thsister said...

So it is true! Chicken sitting? Oh, Jenny...to only you would this opportunity present itself. Sorry her feathers are ruffled, though. I guess mine would be, too, if my sisters "fried".

vivian said...

cute post jenny! starting my morning out with a big smile.. thank you!
have a great day!
vivian

Deb said...

silly chicken...didn't even realize she was amongst royalty...

Sumi said...

Thanks for making me laugh.Badly needed it today.

You missed quite a few things though before you went visiting.She is golden,has such a confident gait.Of course she belongs to a Royal family,so why would she be impressed with small princesses!

I am afraid without learning the fine art of chicken watching and resulting behaviour analysis you cannot even BEGIN to think abt Chicken Sitting business.

Flat Creek Farm said...

Buffy is a beauty, regardless of her current bad attitude (but who could blame the poor girl after recent events?) ;) I'm so impressed that you pitted the cherries for her, Jenny. You would make a wonderful chicken mom, ya know. In your spare time.. hehe. Loved all the chicken humor this morning! Have a great Monday! -Tammy

Jeanie said...

Your post has me doing the Chicken Dance this morning and I have to say that I am very impressed with you Chicken to English translation.

~Kristen~ said...

Oh, my friend, you never fail to put a smile on my face...and I don't even like chickens!!! :-)

Terry said...

Wow! LOL

Little Messy Missy said...

Hahahahaha!

Pixie said...

You know, I've heard chickens are the second cousin twice removed of dinos? They're pretty scarey huh? LOL Feel sorry for the poor thing, it's all alone now...so sad. Bet you and the kids entertained her though :)

Sami said...

Chickens like cherries? (Preferably pitted?) Hmm, excellent tip for starting my Chicken Army... cherry bribery! Now, to acquire a cherry tree, or five. ;)

Also, that is a BIG chicken! Maybe I've only seen flimsy ones before!

Linda @ A La Carte said...

So glad she tolerated the non-feathered intruders! How funny and cherries? Hope she makes it through this heat, maybe being adopted and a chicken of a different color isn't such a bad thing.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

I am so happy you didn't show up to a dead chicken! Good news this morning.

Busy Bee Suz said...

I am glad to see that Buffy is still around...she is a survivor!
Now, would you cut out the pits from my cherries? I would appreciate that very much.

Andrea said...

Chickens like cherries? Who knew? Love that Barbie girl crown! Does she know the Barbie girl song?

Ace said...

I was hoping you'd update us on how the chicken sitting went. If I ever get chickens again I would totally hire you to chicken sit. It would be a long commute, but you'd appreciate my naming of a rooster Esmerelda (they were all SUPPOSED to be hens) and making a pet of him. My family did not.

Vickie said...

Funny post, Miss Jenny!

Tina said...

Oh Jenny, you seem to be able to take anything and make it funny! Good luck with your continued chicken sitting. Is it almost over? Or did you start the franchise? LOL.

Sue said...

I think you may qualify as a public servant now for proliferating humor in an economy that doesn't exactly support it.

In a slightly less philanthropic vein, perhaps you should abandon the chicken sitting enterprise and offer up your blog as therapy for the chronically morose.

=)

LuLu Kellogg said...

Thank heavens she was not laying in the yard with her feet turned up when you got there!

xoxo

My name is PJ. said...

This truly is a first for me! Just think, I'll always be around to remind you of when you chicken sat for your very first foul.......


Priceless.

Write Chick said...

I found your blog some time ago through the Alphabe thing. I keep returning because I love your posts. This one made me laugh. Chicken translation is so hard, yet you do it seemlessly. :-)
Thanks for the chuckle.

Life is good! said...

i'd be cranky also if i'd lost my sisters. buffy, i can relate and enjoy those cherries!

Cheryl D. said...

Poor buffy. Her sisters got fried.

Jingle said...

love the hens
all images are so very cute!

Jingle said...

http://itistimetothinkformyself.blogspot.com/2010/07/pinks-in-6-words-i-wish-u-award-winning.html

Happy Monday!

Serline said...

We'll make a good "couple"... I know a rooster who's Buffy's soulmate ;-)

Marlene said...

Demanding little squawker, isn't she?! Cherries ain't cheap!! LOL!!!

{ L } said...

Jenny, can my kids adopt you as their Grandma? You have so many fun adventures! lol...I always know I can come here if I want to smile and laugh...you are just TOO funny and totally captivating. :)

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Now, you have me feeling sorry for that poor chicken! I'm in tears that it lost its sisters. Jenny... what are you doing to me??? ;-)

XO,

Sheila

Melissa Miller said...

Ha! I adore this post Jenny! I think she is precious. You are a sweet lady to be chicken sitting.

*Squaaaaack* Tell her Hello! :)

laterg8r said...

buffy is sure high maintenance :D

Sue (Someone's Mom) said...

Those cherries are so expensive in my part of the country that I won't buy them for us...much less for chickens! We only get Bing Cherries at our poor little house.

I'm back and of course not a bit disappointed to read about your chicken episode (yes, I did go back and read how you got yourself into this one). I'll do dogs and even a cat now and then, but babysitting a chicken...nope, not me:)

How are you? I feel as if I've been away a very long time.

Ms. Anthropy said...

You don't think Buffy did away with her competition, do you? It does cut out her having to share!

If she's really a Bad Buffy, watch the girls around her. I can tell you from experience... it hurts to get spurred!

mbkatc230 said...

Oh no! Where should we send the cherries? Can't have Buffy the Bad offing our Jenny! I can't believe that you actually pitted the cherries for her. Good grief, does she know how good she's got it? If she keeps giving you trouble, you just let me know. I have a chicken and dumplin' recipe that will knock your socks off:) Kat

The Words Crafter said...

I love the chicken pie bit, classic. You are too funny! Hmmm, interesting that she didn't want the 'Princess' there. You know, back in the day, European aristocrats would off the rulers they didn't care for and place their particular choice on the throne...kinda makes me wonder about Buffy. Does she think she's the princess? Does she see the featherless non chicken as a threat? Did she off her rivals? We may never know...

If you can, stop by my blog sometime after 7pm EST...

Julie Schuler said...

I saw a chicken when we were in Storybook Forest on Saturday. I thought of you.

K9friend said...

It's probably not so easy being a chicken. Ducks have it ever so much nicer, what with getting to swim in ponds and all.

Pat
www.critteralley.blogspot.com

Country Dreaming said...

I know nothing about chickens and don't want to but I do have to say -- this is just too funny!
How did you know the chiken like cherries. Wow.


Melinda

Wanda..... said...

So you 'DO' have pictures! :)

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

Great story! I can't believe you threatened that gorgeous chicken!

Chatty Crone said...

How much longer do yo have this poor chicken! lol

sandie

Pondside said...

That's good, Jenny - you just keep on practicing on other people's chickens and you'll be ready to take on my little flock. I read this post to them (did I mention that this will be among your duties - they enjoy the Life section of the paper, as long as there are no chicken recipes) and they wanted me to tell you that Buffy would probably enjoy a head of lettuce, shredded. Nice and cool for a hot day.

jfb57 said...

I just love the idea of squawk talk!

Melinda Cornish said...

I want chickens so bad....i used to have them, but I guess you cant where we live...I keep suggesting that we sneak a couple in the yard....you know like wild chickens that really arent ours.....somebody just rolls his eyes....mmmph

Melinda Cornish said...

I want chickens so bad....i used to have them, but I guess you cant where we live...I keep suggesting that we sneak a couple in the yard....you know like wild chickens that really arent ours.....somebody just rolls his eyes....mmmph

Amy said...

Ah, chickens. I think the idea of having your own chickens is a very romantic idea, but in reality, they really stink! And can be so moody and mean. You are a much braver person than I am, Jenny Matlock!

Wombat Central said...

Suddenly I am wanting a cherry pie.

KK said...

Chickens scare the squawk out of me!