I was scared.
It happened because I'm polite.
And I don't like to tell anyone I can't understand them.
As a consequence...
...and quite often, actually, at the nail salon, I kinda/sorta just smile dumbly and agree without really knowing what the actual question was.
You'd think I'd know better.
I'm a Mom...
...and a Grandma...
...and I learned really quickly with all these kids to NEVER EVER EVER answer 'yes' to any question I didn't totally comprehend.
...now that I've been threadened I will be more careful to not just answer blindly.
Or would that be dumbly?
There I was...
Sitting in terror while my usual pedicure lady gave me a pedicure around my wounded toenail (that terrifying story linked here and p.s. these are soooooo not my own, personal feet)...
When the other lady that's not my usual pedicure lady came up and peered at my face and asked...
Okay. I don't know what she asked. I didn't understand.
I smiled at her.
She asked, "You want something something something?" again.
I nodded at her.
She asked again. "You want something something something?"
Finally I just said, "Sure, no problem, yes."
In about 10 seconds she was back with a spool of thread.
Hmmm...I wondered if maybe she had been asking me if I wanted to watch her mend something.
She did want me to watch her mend something...
...only the something was my eyebrows.
She took a long piece of thread of the spool and started whipping it around in the air.
"Wait, wait, what are you doing?" I semi-shouted in panic.
"I fixing eyebrows. Your's are very bad."
"So...you're saying this is a discipline thing? You're going to punish my eyebrows with thread?"
"Awwww, you too funny!" she said punching my arm. "Isn't she too funny?" she asked the usual pedicure girl who quickly agreed. "Oh yes, yes, she is too funny."
Funny or not, the thread thing continued.
And I'm not totally sure how she did it.
She kept crissing and crossing the string and then capture deviant eyebrows in their depilitary lasso. I think you can see the whole procedure if you click on this picture. (and p.s. these are soooooo not my own, personal eyebrows)
A pull, a tiny pinch...goodbye errant hair and time to move onto the next victim.
It felt weird.
It didn't really hurt.
It wasn't as relaxing as a hot stone pedicure or eating chocolate.
But after a few minutes when she asked, "Do you want me to something, something, something?", I made her clarify until I understood.
Apparently people get threaded all over their face, arms and body!
"Why? and... ALL over their body?"
"Yes, yes," she got very excited, "It make you very smooth. Very, very smooth."
She didn't say this in a threadening tone of voice or anything.
She said it nicely.
But I declined her kind offer.
She didn't have nearly enough thread in that teensy spool to make me 'very, very smooth' all over.
I hope you didn't feel threadened in any way by the silliness of this post.
The Voice of the Fish
4 hours ago