Friday, May 21, 2010

So… there was this lady…

At the garage sale yesterday.

She was quite irritating. She walked around picking stuff up and asking why we were asking what we were asking. If it was a 50 cent thing she would say “why is this 50 cents?” And I would reply “ummm…because it is.” What I really wanted to say is "because I said so!" But that never worked well with my kids and I suspect it wouldn't have worked well with her either.

After she did this for awhile she decided to focus on some dishes I have on some metal racks, obviously not in the garage sale. At least six feet behind the garage sale tables. But she was quite irritated that I would “taunt” her with these dishes and kept insisting she wanted to know how much they were. Finally, just to make her go away I pretended to check the dishes and said “oh, you’re right, they are for sale…they are $250 for the set. Should I box them up for you?”

I’m a jerk. I’m sorry. And there was this other lady who told us how to find out if bills were counterfeit. She bought 20 bucks worth of stuff. After she was gone I remembered I didn’t check her bill to see if it was fake. It wasn’t. Boy, that was a close call.

And there was a lady who I offered our bags of free stuff to. She looked like she could use free stuff. She asked me what was in there. I said “free stuff”. And she said, “like what kind of free stuff?” And I said I have no idea but it’s free. She didn’t take the free stuff.

The next lady did and she was all excited to get free stuff.

And there were the adorable old people who kind of tottled around with their canes and talked about memories in their wavery voices. I love their stories. I always want to get them a chair and some coffee. And to be honest, I’ve done that more than once.

And there was the guy that kept taking pictures of Mr. Jenny’s 1948 Jeepster. He gave me his number and asked if I could get Mr. Jenny to call him. When Mr. Jenny called him he asked if it would be OK if he brought his Dad over today to look at it. Said his Dad would be really excited to see it…and was it for sale?

And there was the lady that saw the Starbucks Cappucino maker and actually squealed. She stood with her hand on it and called her friend who is looking for one. She said she had to run to the ATM but would be right back to pick it up! Mr. Jenny kinda/sorta told me “I told you so.” Mr. Jenny kinda/sorta may possibly pay for gloating. According to the memory of I have of our marriage vows I am the only one allowed to do that. Ever.

There were the smilers, and the serious people, and the talkers, and the quiet ones. And the ones who grabbed everything in site and then put it all down in different places. There was the guy who picked up the x-box for $25.00 and kept asking me if I was lying about the price?

There was the lady that came up to our little table holding a knife pointed straight at me. I put my hands up and said “don’t kill me!” and she looked at me like I was crazy.

And perhaps I am.

Crazy that is.

Because why in the world would I possibly enjoy this parade of humanity through my garage on a day pushing 100 degrees by noon?

I have no idea why.

But I do!

And it’s starting again in 20 minutes so I’m hitting publish now!

Oh, and bring money. Come buy stuff.

But you can’t buy the Jeepster or the not-for-sale-dishes! So there!

Sigh.


post signature

66 comments:

Debbie said...

You get all kinds now don't you? Funny stories, can't wait to hear about the cast of characters today!

Terry said...

ROFL!! This is why I don't have garage sales...I don't like people! LOL Have fun today! :0)

Pondside said...

There's no parade like the human parade - I love people-watching!

Chatty Crone said...

Day two and you are holding up well! I'm proud of you. Are you open tomorrow? Sandie

Steph @ Flip Flop Chic said...

I did the yard sale at my in-laws' church last year and I was selling some sets of my old scrubs (never been in the dryer in immaculate condition) for $5 a SET, I had one lady hovering around the table for 20 mins trying to talk me down. She wanted to pay $2! I kept telling her flat out no, and she finally said
"well, do you want to sell them or not?!" I replied with "yes, but I am SELLING them, not GIVING them away!" She walked off in a huff. Little did she know but everything I didn't sell was donated to the thrift store that supports our local no-kill animal shelter. :)

Linda said...

Jenny a yard sale is a fun/horrible thing! I love to talk to folks also it makes it interesting. Hate the pushy one's but I can push right back. Hope today goes as well and you find some more interesting folks to tell us about!

Jana said...

AW MAN, I want to come! I would be the weird girl who is really tall and chatty

Janet Johnson said...

TOO funny! Great descriptions of the people. Felt like I was there. :)

Parsley said...

This is why I HATE having a garage sale but sometimes you just 'gotta'. ugh

Sami said...

Crazy garage sale ladies with knives! EEK! Those are the worst kinds of shoppers... the deranged ones...

I would come visit your garage sale, and I promise not to wibble over the plates, or point sharp objects at the people who worked tirelessly to provide people with deals on Xboxes and coffemakers ... and free stuff!! Who can resist free stuff?? It's free, darnit!

Hope your day goes well and your sanity doesn't dissolve in the heat! :)

Marlene said...

Heeheehee....if someone asked me "why" something was marked at fifty cents, I'd look at her in all seriousness, and say, "Oh, you're right. It's awfully low, huh? Never mine, it's $1.25 now." ;)

We are having a community yard sale in our area tomorrow. My hubby wants to put stuff out. I don't. Period. I'll let you know who wins that one.

Julienne said...

I'm the one who stands...looks...dives right in grabs...makes an offer....then walks out pumping fists high in the air (even if you didn't accept the offer)
Because I have probably got something I absolutely cannot live without for a really great price!!!!!
I LOVE GARAGE SALES!

♥ Calamity Anne ♥ said...

X-Box for $25...I wish I was there! Bag of free...I ♥ free! Somthing tells me you're too far away for me to do some shopping!

5thsister said...

LOL...we had a huge garage sale before we moved into our house. We had people actually steal stuff. Someone got away with a counterfeit Rolex...served him right.

Becca's Dirt said...

Hope it is a very successful yard sale. Sounds like it already is. Have fun with it.

Terra said...

the garage sale tales...I see a book in the works...

Julie Schuler said...

If someone asked me why something was fifty cents I think I would have lost my mind.
Hide the knives!

Valerie said...

Hilarious...see that is why I have NEVER held a garage sale. I've already marked my stuff down...don't ask me to make it cheaper! LOL

You are soooo mean, taunting that lady that way! HA!

Hope you make lots of good sales today!

Val

Cheryl said...

More proof that Goodwill loves me.

Just Kim said...

The very reasons that remind me why I never want to go into my own business. Customers. A perfectly sane person turns into "The Customer." I worked in retail too long.

You have such a sense of humor about it. :) Maybe I need more of that.

criticalcrass said...

but i SO wanted those dishes!!!

jen said...

This is exactly how I felt at our last garage sale. People are funny!
And I wish she'd said yes to $250 dishes! What would you have done then, huh?

Julia Christie said...

Ahhh Humanity! "There's nothin' like folks'!
Good luck with day two!

Smiles

GardenofDaisies said...

Jenny, Garage sales really are a great place to "people watch". (Every sociology and psychology major should be required to sit in on a weekend garage sale and then write a paper about their observations.)
I like the little kids that come to my garage sales the best.
The 7 year old best buddies that come riding down the block on their bicycles with 2 dollars in their hands that their Moms just gave them so they could experience shopping for something on their own. (and to get them out of the house for 20 minutes. So they purchase the book on magic tricks and the wooden snake and ride back home with huge smiles on their faces.
Or the little 4-5 year old girls who can't tear themselves away from the table filled with stuffed animals. Price gets slashed in half and finally Mom decided it's OK for daughter to purchase one or two beanie babies.
And then there are the little ones who come and hang on to Mommy's hand, asking over and over if they can buy the pretty hair barrettes that cost 50 cents, and Mommy tells them over and over no, no, NO!. And then Mom buys something for herself that is just a decorative, thing, and as they leave I run quick to catch them before they get in their car, to give the little girl the hair barrettes and tell her they are free today.
(As you can tell I don't make much money at my sales.)

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

I know exactly what you mean. There is a girl who has been trying to buy one of my horses, so, finally I decided to go ahead and sell him because I think they would be a good match. Well, then she wants to ride him. Ok, she does and spends two hours telling my trainer how much she loves him and she'll think about it. Then she wants to ride him again, ok, same scenario, two hours of how much she loves him. She's currently thinking about how much she loves him and if she really wants to buy him...aagghhh

Jules said...

Love it! I love sitting all day at my daughter's garage sale every year. Just for the entertainment.

Brenda said...

I would soooo be there in a heartbeat if I lived nearby. I could sit with Dad and serve at security... well, security with some umbrella drinks, y'know for the heat and all, LOL!

Jennifer said...

Ooohhhhh....
I'd have to bite my tongue around that first woman.
Seriously.

However the rest of it doesn't seem too bad.
We've never had a garage sale.
My parents never wanted to put up with it... Correction: my dad never wanted to put up with it.
He hates garage sales.
My mother always loved them.

We could be driving down the road with an important mission and we would just HAVE to stop and pull into someone's garage sale... Ahh... Memories...

Jeanie said...

Oh, those poor, crazy, funny people, without a clue that you were going to share their antics will all of us. I love that you can make us feel like we were right there with you. I can't wait to hear who visits you today.

laterg8r said...

people can be soooo annoying LOL :D

The Quintessential Magpie said...

What a cute, cute, CUTE post, Jenny! And so true. I hope you make lots and lots and lots of money and have lots and lots and lots of stories to tell.

XO,

Sheila :-)

Lourie said...

I'm a total smart-alec, I would have said, "Because it's not 51 cents" to the lady who asked why it was 50 cents! I do that to my 4 year old sometimes.

Nancy C said...

Great stuff. I'm so glad you made the woman's coffee day. I can get behind that.

Cheryl D. said...

Wow! You HAD to be joking about the X-box price, right? Right? I wish you lived in my neighborhood!

Oh, and funny post too!

Jocelyn said...

Oh did you ever have these shoppers pegged!!! I love watching Human Dynamics....and you have them down to a science!!!

We will be having ours on June 12th....

Good Luck and I hope you are successful in your hard WORK!!!!

Jo said...

wow, day 2 ... i'm impressed ...i can usually only go one day ... i find it exhausting but interesting ... there sure are some interesting people out there ... have fun and make lotsa money!!!

Ms Sparrow said...

What a crowd you drew! I have given up on having garage sales because I'd wind up with so much stuff unsold and almost no profit.
It all goes to Goodwill now and I eliminate myself as the middle-woman.

mishebe said...

lol. your so funny. U must have patience. i will never do a garage sale again.....

Quilting in My Pyjamas said...

I wish I could come to your garage sale. Why do you have to live so far away!

Even your garage sales are hilarious.

Anita said...

Sounds like you got your share of entertainment. :)

Connie said...

When we had our very first gargae sale, we were moving. We had the people who came at 6:00 in the morning as I was setting up wanting to rifle through all the boxes. After a few hours of tons of people, we had a little break. My husband, came out of the house long enough to say, "It takes a special breed of people to come to these things!" He didn't realize there was a customer perusing the items until after he had said it. He went in and shut the door, leaving me to feel awkward!

Glad it's going well. Will be waiting for the next report!

Busy Bee Suz said...

A garage sale really does bring in a pleathora of folks.
We have had a few in the past and my husband declared that we will NEVEr have one again. People steal. People litter. And even some people SPIT at you. Yeah. That is a story for another day.
I hope your sale today was GOOD and uneventful.
So, did you sell the Jeepster??
:)

Ms. Anthropy said...

Hope you had equally great luck, today!

Melinda Cornish said...

if I was there, I would come, just so we could dish about it later....it sounds like you are having fun!

VictoriaS said...

Jenny,
I needed to visit your blog today!
Thanks for the giggles! I used to have alot of garage sales in Colorado! They CAN be fun but I usually ended up sunburned and irritable! Oh, wait, that's every day~ well, the irritable part anyway!

Nadeen said...

I'd come sit in your garage with you but uhm, that 100° thingy just wouldn't cut it.

Isn't it just fun to watch people. And strange species, don't you think?

Brenda said...

I am smiling. Its been a really long day and I need that smile. Thanks.

Country Dreaming said...

Our madness begins tomorow at 8:00 am--Oh Boy!
Spent all evening finishing the pricing thing and setting up. Mr. Ken was a big help too.

Have fun.

Melinda

Catherine Holman said...

Wish I could stop by and make you an offer for those dishes! Have a great sale.

Tina said...

Loved this "slice of life" view. You've got a way of capturing an entire seen with a few well-placed words. True talent. And if I came to your garage sale, I'd be the girl with her hands full, saying, "This adds up to $3.50. Would you take $3?"

H said...

$200 for the dishes? Awww! Go on, you know you want to... H :)

jfb57 said...

Sounds like fun Jenny even though you have to count to 10 on occasions!

My name is PJ. said...

It sounds a little like a trip to Walmart...except you get to have memorable one-on-ones with the characters.

But pushing 100 degrees by noon? Yikes! How do you do that? Just the thought makes me melt.

My name is PJ. said...

PS.....It's, uh, Saturday morning here on the east coast.....so, uh, where is Saturday Centus? :)

CherylK said...

I love garage sales! Wish I could have gone to yours...love how you put that strange woman in her place...good for you! So did the squeally woman ever return for the cappuccion maker?

Dee said...

LOL. I would rather be one of the crazies at a sale then give one.:) I hope your sale was successful.

Sarah said...

Jenny, well now, maybe I need to see a photo of that set of dishes. LOL
See you tomorrow. ~ Thanks for the heads up!~ Sarah

jeff campbell said...

This should be titled "Wackos at an Arizona Garage Sale". Who would not want to do this on a hot Saturday with all the rich writing material that comes to YOUR door ? Everything is for sale...at some price, although you may have to pay someone to take the free stuff. What did they think was in the bag...dried desert cow pies?

BONNIE K said...

That is what I love about garage sales! We had one years ago where my friend's mom donated a very ugly lamp. We were all giving her grief about it - no one was ever going to buy that ugly lamp! So our first customer arrived, made a beeline for that lamp and that was our first sale of the day.

Amy said...

Wow, what a day! You are a people watcher, I can tell. What fun craziness was going on. Almost makes you want to sit down with a lemonade and enjoy the show. Except I would want a hot chocolate because it is cold here today.

Christy said...

Hi! garage salers are a special breed of special people imho! Both the sellers and the buyers. That is why I love them so much!

Molly said...

You always make me laugh outloud. Reading about all your visitors makes me want to have a garage sale. For about 30 seconds.

Sue said...

Garage sales are always a hoot. And it sounds like you got your fair share of crazies.

=)

Tracy said...

Jenny I am sending the very nice people from my Q post to see you. They will help you just like they helped me don't be scared . LOL

The Lone Dollier said...

Girl, you must have been out of your mind to have a sale LOL. Hubby makes me donate EVERYTHING to the Salvation Army (or Goodwill) or throw it out. REFUSES to have a garage sale.

Though, I LOVE to go to them!

Smiles~
Marilyn

PS. Now with knee problems. You should see me trying to stand UP after kneeling down at a sale. HILARIOUS!

Andrea said...

Oh I'd have garage sales all the time if it could just be the garage sale part. Not the getting ready and cleaning up part. At the last garage sale I had with my sister, a dog bit me. I'd leave out that part too.