So… there was this lady…

At the garage sale yesterday.

She was quite irritating. She walked around picking stuff up and asking why we were asking what we were asking. If it was a 50 cent thing she would say “why is this 50 cents?” And I would reply “ummm…because it is.” What I really wanted to say is "because I said so!" But that never worked well with my kids and I suspect it wouldn't have worked well with her either.

After she did this for awhile she decided to focus on some dishes I have on some metal racks, obviously not in the garage sale. At least six feet behind the garage sale tables. But she was quite irritated that I would “taunt” her with these dishes and kept insisting she wanted to know how much they were. Finally, just to make her go away I pretended to check the dishes and said “oh, you’re right, they are for sale…they are $250 for the set. Should I box them up for you?”

I’m a jerk. I’m sorry. And there was this other lady who told us how to find out if bills were counterfeit. She bought 20 bucks worth of stuff. After she was gone I remembered I didn’t check her bill to see if it was fake. It wasn’t. Boy, that was a close call.

And there was a lady who I offered our bags of free stuff to. She looked like she could use free stuff. She asked me what was in there. I said “free stuff”. And she said, “like what kind of free stuff?” And I said I have no idea but it’s free. She didn’t take the free stuff.

The next lady did and she was all excited to get free stuff.

And there were the adorable old people who kind of tottled around with their canes and talked about memories in their wavery voices. I love their stories. I always want to get them a chair and some coffee. And to be honest, I’ve done that more than once.

And there was the guy that kept taking pictures of Mr. Jenny’s 1948 Jeepster. He gave me his number and asked if I could get Mr. Jenny to call him. When Mr. Jenny called him he asked if it would be OK if he brought his Dad over today to look at it. Said his Dad would be really excited to see it…and was it for sale?

And there was the lady that saw the Starbucks Cappucino maker and actually squealed. She stood with her hand on it and called her friend who is looking for one. She said she had to run to the ATM but would be right back to pick it up! Mr. Jenny kinda/sorta told me “I told you so.” Mr. Jenny kinda/sorta may possibly pay for gloating. According to the memory of I have of our marriage vows I am the only one allowed to do that. Ever.

There were the smilers, and the serious people, and the talkers, and the quiet ones. And the ones who grabbed everything in site and then put it all down in different places. There was the guy who picked up the x-box for $25.00 and kept asking me if I was lying about the price?

There was the lady that came up to our little table holding a knife pointed straight at me. I put my hands up and said “don’t kill me!” and she looked at me like I was crazy.

And perhaps I am.

Crazy that is.

Because why in the world would I possibly enjoy this parade of humanity through my garage on a day pushing 100 degrees by noon?

I have no idea why.

But I do!

And it’s starting again in 20 minutes so I’m hitting publish now!

Oh, and bring money. Come buy stuff.

But you can’t buy the Jeepster or the not-for-sale-dishes! So there!

Sigh.